Through Rose Colored Glasses

A Frank Post

2012-01-22T20:25:00.000-08:00

I wanted to check in here. I really miss blogging but despite my ache to get back to this little spot on the world wide web Im still at a loss for the motivation to post regularly and in need of more time to really sit down and share what all is going on in my world.

Ever since moving to Nashville my life has been a bit of a whirlwind. A whole lot of change! I guess that is how life happens, Change All At Once. I think, as they say, change can happen slowly sometimes, gradual. But sometimes it's like your world just gets turned upside down by one decision that affects everything else.

I love Nashville. Truly I love it. I vibe with this city. I dig it and I love it. Granted, I cant proclaim to have explored every nook and cranny that this city has to offer yet, quite the opposite actually, I feel like Im still, after hmm... almost 6 months, getting settled on an internal and emotional level that has left me with little time yet to venture into all this city has to offer on the level of entertainment and cool-ness. But I WILL get to that point sooner than later I feel.

Im glad I moved on the cusp of winter. Because for me, sudden change inevitably brings a winter to my soul - deep soul searching accompanied with a plethora of emotions ranging from euphoric joy to despair and depression. It's just who I am; I feel things deeply and it often times takes me a good bit longer to accustom myself to new situations on an emotional level. I will get 'there' eventually, but after many years of dealing with the 'winter' of change my psyche often puts me through when life events occur, I know myself well and know that these winters are often great times of growth that lead me, ultimately, to more self discovery and personal strength. Though hard, they are a gift.

And that is where I am right now. Trying to settle myself in the physical and the emotional in this city I know I will call home for quite some time.

I moved here with the naivete that it would be easy to find a place to live that would be the equivalent to my deeply loved little home in Birmingham... It wasnt. Not only was I naive about the price of living in a metropolitan city (as metropolitan as you get in the south) but also about my ability to replace my love for that settled feeling 'home' brings in a brand new city that offered nothing familiar and everything unsettling.

After a two week stint in an extended stay hotel I like to refer to as HELL I was lucky enough to find a semi affordable home in a semi ghetto/semi hipster area of town - The catch to the affordable price- No central heat or air. Oh yea! Getting wild over here. I have to say though, It's been nice. Its a place I can call my own when I was worried I would be taking up permanent residence in that god-awful extended stay.

And although, not "ideal" (spoiled me talking here) after many tears of "I wish I could move my condo from Bham here, this doesnt feel like home, why is this city so expensive" and living without my furniture for three months, I finally packed up my belongs in bham and made the no central heat or air house as much a home as possible. And some how between freezing in the basement that offers no shelter from the winter cold and the wall heaters upstairs that dry my skin out and make me feel like a snake, I have come to love this ghetto/hipster side of town and Im happy to have some place to lay my head and come home to at night.

On the job front, It's been the hardest thing emotionally to overcome. I left a company I absolutely adore and believe in, ultimately to move to a city that I knew I would love and to be closer to family. I knew I wasn't trading 'up' in terms of work atmosphere but I didn't take into consideration just how hard leaving a company that loved and valued me and who I mutually loved and valued would be. IT HAS BEEN FREAKING HARD. But I am thankful to have job. And after a few months of self pity and a harsh learning curve I now go to bed on Sunday nights praying "God give me grace this week" and ultimately walk into the building with a good attitude. I KNOW there is a point to me being at this job. despite how different and awkward I feel most days, I know deep down this IS part of the plan. That is comforting, and in the end, what makes it bearable.

I know all of this sounds like one big complaint - It's not. I am happy, I am content to walk through this season of change and settling knowing that I wanted this change and that ultimately life happens and things are good. There is always something good in everything. Despite this somewhat emotional 'winter' I am full of joy. I see my family more often than I have in the past 7 years. I have the ability to wake up on a Saturday morning and decide on a whim to go spend the day with my parents, something that couldnt happen in Birmingham. I have a boyfriend who makes me extremely happy and is a man I am happy to call my significant other and who makes me proud for just being who he is (and he has a beard :) ). I am in a thriving, fun, artsy, cultural, exciting city! I love it! I feel like I fit here and that is only a feeling I know will grow. I am forcing myself to meet people, get out of my comfort zone, and at the same time I am also learning the art of patience. Patience knowing that things happen gradually. I cant expect to move to a brand new city and have everything in life be perfect. It will take time to find the perfect 'home', time to find my perfect career fit and time to find a new group of friends. But I have the patience to know that all those things WILL come because I believe that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

2012

2012-01-03T13:03:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year.

I know everyone's reader is going to be clogged with an insane amount of new year posts.

Sorry to be a cliche in the blogging world on this 3rd day of 2012.

I spent a much needed vacation (my one and only of the year, after I canceled my scheduled one to move and start a new job in two weeks...) reading, relaxing and being with dear friends.

After a few days relaxing on my couch and reading, I headed to Boone, NC with a group of friends to spend time in a mountain cabin consuming delicious chili and wine with great company.

I spent the new year in a backwoods NC ski resort lodge trapped somewhere in time between 1968 and 1972. But I have to say, the band was incredibly good as was the people watching and I wouldnt have wanted to ring in the new year anywhere else with anyone else.

Onto resolutions.

Do you make them?

I get that on top of posting about the new year along with every other blogger, actually making resolutions is another cliche I happen to find myself repeating over and over each year.

I think it's good to make a list out of goals and resolutions. I have found, as I age (I just wanted to write that clearly for humor) That the key to resolutions is dropping the guilt that is normally associated with failing at them and instead, just trying to stay conscious of what you would like accomplish and set your sites on those things with grace and kindness to yourself.

Any goal has a better rate of success with grace pushing it forward rather than guilt, right?

So with that said here are my resolutions a la the iphone notepad

And I decided to make a blog goal.

I would really like a new design. I really hate this one. It's just not me.

So at some point, I want to accomplish that.

Cheers to the new year.

How was your weekend?

2011-12-12T13:11:00.000-08:00

This is really all I have to say about mine:

Champagne + Mens Neck Wear = A Good Time.

To replicate this evening of pleasure, might I suggest starting here with a 'Like' followed by a click here and then I would most definitely begin filling your sink with Champagne stat.

Cheers.

Wrap It

2011-12-07T14:22:00.000-08:00

1st. After watching this I need more scarves in my life.

2nd. I loved this video just for the way it was edited and put together. So well made for a How To fashion vid.

3rd. See more here

And finally, Scarves Im coveting:

Burberry Giant Check Gauze Scarf

Marc By Marc Jacobs Lee Lee Fur Scarf

Theodora and Callum Ikat Scarf

And A great gift idea:

Love Quotes Scarf they come in so many colors!

2011-11-18T14:31:00.000-08:00

" She had a Cocktail in her hand

And Confetti in her hair..."

Have a lovely weekend!

Wednesday Dump

2011-11-16T14:36:00.000-08:00

Hi Again.

Look at me trying to be more regular with the posting.

Is anyone else's world starting to get busy?

I was just sitting in my office thinking, not about work, but about all the Christmas presents I have yet to purchase.

I am determined to purchase all my gifts early in the game this year. I have a tendency to delay the gift buying process and in turn, end up rushed and giving gifts wihout much meaning.

I refuse to fall into the trap this year. I vow (cross fingers) to have gifts bought/picked out for everyone on my list by Dec 15.

Hold me to it...

Then there are the Christmas cards. I gotta have those purchased by the 1st in order to get out the next week.

Should I even call this a blog anymore or just my reminder calendar?

Keeping with the calendar theme,

What do you have planned this weekend?

My dear friends are coming for a visit!

Have I mentioned there is really no furniture in the house I am renting in Nashville?

Yea, because I moved so fast from Bham to here I left all my furniture and decor in my condo.

All I have here is my bed and a couch and dining room table left, so graciously, by the owners.

Im a little disappointed I cant show my friends my new place in tip top shape (because it needs a little TLC).

But no matter.

My one task I am determined to conquer to make my home, in the slightest, a bit more homey, is making a sink skirt like this for my two bathroom sinks.

Im not a crafty person. Ive had anxiety all day over tackling this project.

Shoot up some good vibes it turns out well!

Just popping i n

2011-11-11T09:54:00.000-08:00

Hi,

Popping in to say hello.

How are all of you?

Things in my world are busy, busy and busy.

But with fun things I must add.

Nashville is fantastic.

Really, I dont lie to you.

I love this city more and more as the weeks go bye.

While I love this city and am beyond happy I moved here.

I am struggling on the job front.

It's been hard leaving a company I really, really loved but one that didnt offer much opportunity for growth.

And while I ultimately took my current position in Nashville to get me to this city and closer to family, Im struggling with actually having to be in my current position day in and day out.

Im not sure it's the best fit. (granted it's only been a month and a half so I cant adequately make an assessment on such a short time frame). I thrive on being with people, I thrive on relationship and interaction in the work place. It's how I feel passion and a sense of accomplishment and these human interactions are what spur me on to do my best work and be motivated.

But in this current position this aspect (that is essential, I have discovered to my well being) is lacking to say the least. It's hard. I am hoping it will get better. I have found that, as much time as I spend in Excel, it is quite a dull partner and doesnt quite compare to the characters I used to spend my 9-5 with back in Birmingham.

So that's where I am right now. Being fully transparent. In a city I know I love. But in a 9-5 I'm not so sure about.

On another note.

I leave you with a picture highlighting some of my after hour activities.

The man friend is quite the busy bee. You can read about his moonlighting venture here and here (shameless plug, I digress) . Outside of moonlighting with bow ties he also works in the music biz during the 9 to 5 and because of this I have enjoyed some nice little perks recently.

Honestly, I've never listened to much country music, sure Carrie has some great legs and Miranda is hot as hell, but the muic? I dont know one song from another, or the artists for that matter. Either way, I enjoyed a lovely night watching the CMA's live and afterward, indulged at the open bar at the Sony after party at the beautiful Hermitage Hotel.

Hopefully I will be popping in over here on the reg to keep you updated on the here and there.

Have a lovely weekend!

Sights and Sounds - Nashville

2011-10-26T09:11:00.000-07:00

So I've been in Nashville a little over a month.

And I truly love the city.

It's just a totally different vibe than Birmingham.

Not better per-se, just different.

To me, Birmingham isn't quite a 'big city', it never held that vibe for me. But it isn't a small town either. For me, Birmingham was always a very 'homey' city with great nooks and niche's such as Homewood and Mt. Brook. It's a great place to raise a family, offers some unique flavors and has it's own character but again, in no way is it a 'big city'.

Nashville on the other hand exudes a 'big city' vibe to me but with charm. It's not cold or harsh as some big cities have been characterized as having. It's unique in that it's southern through and through but offers diversity and depth lacking in most southern cities struggling for an identity outside the same ole same ole 'southern charm" tag line. (clears throat... my opinion of course...)

Since Im new to this 'charming big city' I decided it would be fun to highlight my experiences as I familiarize myself with my new home.

I thought this would offer a newcomers perspective to a city loved by so many.

Lets begin, shall we?

The first local restaurant experience I had in Nashville was when I was house hunting before I had even packed and moved my belongs this way permanently.

I was strapped with my notebook filled with Craigslist potential homes and was making my way all over the city with my dear friend Kammie.

Mind you, it was pouring down rain, I was (and am still, after a month) completely lost and then hunger struck.

We were in a little up and coming neighborhood on the West side of Nashville called Sylvan Park. Lost, I'll admit, but starving, we happened upon a park and a street corner with shops and restaurants.

We pulled the car into the first parking lot we saw and we got lucky because it just so happened to be:

The Local Taco.

Located at:

Sylvan Par

4501 Murphy Road
Nashville, TN 37209
(also a location in Brentwood)

The Local Taco offers it's name sake in cuisine: Tacos.

Delicious and fresh one's at that!

I had the southern fried chicken taco which was exactly what you'd expect, it didn't disappoint with it's classic ingredients and texmex twist. But my favorite was the buffalo chicken taco. Definitely spicy but again, with a southern twist added in with the buffalo sauce.

For my first casual dining experience in Nashville, I feel I did all right. I would definitely suggest The Local Taco for a quick stop if you're visiting the city and need a fresh, easy lunch option.

Stay tuned for more Sights and Sounds as I continue to explore this new city of mine.

Im alive

2011-10-13T14:46:00.000-07:00

I dont even know if anyone will read this, I've been absent so long.

But I wanted to shout to the Interweb world: IM ALIVE.

Yea alive and kick'n.

- Obviously Im in Nashville.

Made that happen.

- Lived in an extended stay for two weeks. And yes, it was as bad as you are imagining.

- Finally found a home on the East side of Nashville. Call me a Hipster, I dont care.

- Oh and to solidify my East Side hipster status, I attended an Occupy Wall Street assembly,

yes I did. And I have to admit I quite agree with their declaration.

- I've had many a lovely 'Family' dinners with dear friends

- Had a few impromptu backyard fires

- And started dating a boy, I guess you call him my boyfriend. And he sort of resembles Joaquin Phoenix during these days:

you know I dig it.

No Woman No Cry

2011-09-13T07:36:00.000-07:00

I'm in countdown mode.

3 days left in bham and then I'm off.

People keep asking me if I'm excited or scared or any other number of emotions. For the sake of keeping the conversation on a surface level I always nod and say " Oh yes, I'm so excited". Which is true to a point but 'excited' doesn't really seem to adequately describe everything going on in my head.

I started packing things last night. ( dear Jesus, I have so much crap). I had my pod on shuffle while I went through and weeded out pajamas, work out clothes, and the insane amount of toiletries I have acquired and hoarded through the years.

as I was pondering why I have not 1 but 4 extra deodorant sticks, this song came on shuffle:

I started to cry. It's funny, I remember listening to this song over and over and over in my dorm, on my way to class, in the car, anywhere and everywhere when I went through a break up in college. It's funny how this song really was such a comfort to me. And I remember after going through that I started listening to this song anytime I was upset or scared or just lonely.

And now whenever I hear it, it immediately takes me back to all those times. But not in a bad way. It's not one of those songs that makes me freak out and switch it to another song because it brings up all those hard memories. It makes me realize how far I've come. It's cheesy to say but it's true. It just makes me feel better about whatever is happening. I mean it's true " Everything's gonna be alright..." and that's a good thing to have in your head phones, or coming out your speakers when you drive away from a city you call home.

In Jaimaca on Bob's 'thinking' rock.

Nashville

2011-09-09T12:10:00.000-07:00

So I'm moving.

To Nashville.

In a week weeks.

Yep, a week.

I cant wrap my head around it either.

Let's start from the beginning shall we?

I got a job there.

So that's really how this all came about.

It sort of fell into my lap really. I mean obviously I had to work for it (duh) but it turned out they were looking for someone with my specific qualifications. And they we're interested in me enough to bring me from Alabama to Nashville for an interview and then to hire me from out of state.

And then I accepted.

And now I'm moving.

It was sort of inevitable really.

I grew up very close to Nashville, just two hours from my hometown and, since I can never really move back home, Nashville is the best place to put me closer to family and dear friends.

Plus it's just a fun, exciting, bad ass city, let's be honest.

Sometime's I want to panic over the fact that I have a house to sell here, I have no home to go to once I actually get to Nashville and that basically, I'm leaving a really great place and friends behind in the span of two weeks. Two weeks just doesn't seem to be an adequate amount of time to say goodbye.
But, it's funny, (and a little out of my nature really) I haven't been panicked or worried. Sure, I have bouts where I just sort of cry or freak out for about 2.5 seconds but then I'm reminded how really peaceful I feel about all of this.
I just see things falling into place with this decision. I wont go into all of them, they wont make sense. But I'm in awe of how peaceful and easy it was to find a temporary living situation and how the cost of that temporary place just happened to drop into my lap, not from my bank account.
How I have a dear couple friend moving at the exact same time to the same city and we'll be able to share a moving truck which will offset the cost of moving to another state. And how nice it will be to have friendly faces going through the same awkwardness of moving to a brand new city without out knowing many people.

It has been a peaceful transition at work too. Sad, but really peaceful. I couldn't have asked for a better boss these past 3 years, and honestly, I'm not sure I'll ever work for a better boss. (kinda tearing up just writing about it) But she was a champ when I told her I would be leaving in two weeks and she just confirmed that I would be fantastic anywhere I went (it's good to get affirmation when you're about to do something scary). Plus the transition of me handing my position over to someone new hasn't been stressful either. Sad, yes. But I know for a fact my transition is going to benefit another in a great way and it just confirms again that I've made the right decision.

So yea, there's a lot up in the air still. I guess that's part of doing something sort of scary, new and adventurous. There's not an ironed out detailed plan when you decide to do crazy things.

I'll keep you posted...
C

Things I plan on bringing back into play in my life

2011-08-10T13:41:00.000-07:00

- Braids

- Ankle Bracelets

- Statement ring

- Maybe a Topsy Tail (for the right occasion why not? Remember how happy it made YOU when you were 5?)

- Postcards ( the art of finding the perfect one for that certain someone, writing a note on the back, stamping it and sending it on it's merry way)

- Red Lipstick

- Amy Grant ( I dont care what you say... YOU ARE STARLIGHT; IM GALILEO...)

Thoughts?

(told you they're cool... remember?...)

Statement of Faith

2011-07-29T14:19:00.000-07:00

I gotta get out of this mindset of "This is Wrong" and more in the mindset of "Just Love" when it comes to my thoughts on religion and well everything else really.

I have been thinking A LOT about religion the past few months.

I'm not one for a bandwagon really. I am just skeptical of bandwagons when it comes to anything besides music really. Because honestly, yes, I have jumped on multiple top 40 bandwagons for the shear fact that Katy Perry and The Blacked Eyed Peas DO make my Friday nights a little bit more fun.

But bandwagons, when it comes to anything involving politics, religion, or moral 'group think' mentalities, I try to steer clear of. I just cant get behind any sort of mass message that boxes me in. Whether it concerns my politics, religion or moral code. I just feel like a lot of things are situational and depend on the people and circumstances.

I gave up church.

There I said it.

I don't go.

And I don't like it.

Not necessarily church in the sense of how the Bible describes church: believers gathering together to grow and commune with each other. But I have given up this boxed- in- mega -church- one- prescription -fits- all mindset thing that the American church (for the most part) has going on.

I just can't stomach it.

I felt so defeated for so long trying to make myself follow all the bullet points that the preacher spoke about each Sunday that would improve my life and trying to fit into a small group with people who you know for five minutes then never speak to after the semester of small group ends.

And I really got freaked after I read this and thought that if I didn't save the world, give all my money away or serve every minute of every day that I wasn't really following the gospel.

I Honestly questioned my Christianity for a good month because I felt so freaking defeated after reading that book.

and, good lord, don't even get me started on all the theological shit that people talk about all the time are you Calvinist or Armanian or a TULIP or a I-need-to-categorize-you-as-best-I-can-in-order-to-know-if-we-can-really-relate bullshit.

It literally made my head spin, made me sad, made me feel like something was wrong with me and like I would never get it.

Then I talked to my dad.

The wisest, most grace filled, simple theologian, god loving man on the planet (yes I'm biased).

Who told me that I'm a child of God. Nothing can change that. Nothing. Not a belief system or rules, or some really good theology or a really famous mega church preacher. Or me saving the entire planet or instead committing every sin in the book. Nothing changes the fact that I am a child of God. Nothing.

It's just Jesus inside me. Just Jesus.

So I can experience Him anyway He desires me too as long as I tap into the inside and listen.

I can see Him in nature, in other people, in ordinary conversations with ordinary sometimes Christians, sometimes not, people. I can experience Him in music, in art, in movies and books and, well, everywhere and in anything.

He is everywhere and He is in me.

It's that simple according to Bo Bell.

I like that.

I don't really want religion.

I just really want to know God.

And I don't really want to be boxed into a list of things that I have to believe or do to be a 'Christian'. If that's the case, I'm with Ann Rice who recently stated:

“I quit being a Christian. I’m out. In the name of Christ, I refuse to be anti-gay. I refuse to be anti-feminist. I refuse to be anti-artificial birth control. I refuse to be anti-Democrat. I refuse to be anti-secular humanism. I refuse to be anti-science. I refuse to be anti-life. In the name of …Christ, I quit Christianity and being Christian. Amen.”

I'll just love Jesus instead.

Ive just come to realize that people experience God in different ways and that is just fine. He made us in his image and if you believe in Jesus, he is inside you and that may come out in different ways for different people.

He made us all different of course!

You just gotta tap into what is inside and learn to go with it.

And really, I think it all just comes down to love. Jesus is love and all he ever did was love, not tell people what to do or how to live or what was wrong or right. He just loved people.

and that's enough for me right now.

If your just as confused as I am, may I suggest some non boxed-in food for thought:

http://sareliz.com/2010/07/28/sareys-brief-guide-on-how-to-be-a-christian-not-an-asshole/

http://www.amazon.com/Divine-Nobodies-Shedding-Religion-unlikely/dp/0849913985/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1311974250&sr=8-1

http://www.amazon.com/Wide-Open-Spaces-Paint---Number/dp/0849913993/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1311974263&sr=1-2

Happy Harry Potter Day

2011-07-14T07:23:00.000-07:00

The scar had not pained Harry for nineteen years.

All was well.

(image here)

Of course I'm going to see the movie at midnight tonight. You only live once.

Happy Harry Potter day to you.

Question of The Day...

2011-07-13T09:47:00.001-07:00

Where did my blog header and icons go....

Hmmm....

WTF.

26

2011-06-29T06:54:00.000-07:00

Is there a way to be content and at the same time know that what your most content about wont last forever?

Because that is exactly how I feel about this year.

A year ago I was celebrating my 25th at a hotel with a few of my favorite people.

I cant remember in full detail how I felt and what was going through my head but to some degree I do remember that I was very unsettled and in search of something but not sure exactly what.

I don't know when exactly contentment set in but it has.

I bought a house here.

I feel extremely blessed and happy to work where I work and to be surrounded by great people everyday.

I have prayed desperately ever since I graduated for a great group of steady friends here in Alabama. And Throughout this year I have had many new people come into my life and many old relationships take on new meaning to me.

I am grateful for that.

I am very content.

but

I'm not complacent.

I feel like I have been striving for a long time trying to figure out the what, the how, the who, the when, the why's of a lot of things.

And this year I just took a serious chill pill.

I invested in being where I am right now.

And because I have worked so hard this 25th year at just being present; I can look back on this year and see the fruits of that labor:

Good friends, A good home, A great job with people I love, a sense of peace and a comfortableness with myself I was lacking in years past due to all that striving and stress.

I am so easily distracted by my past and too easily fretful of my future.

And when I look back on my 25th year I am happy with it all because I was present.

And to be present, I can attest, allows for a lot of simple happiness to flow into your life.

I will take that with me into my 26th year.

As I contemplate another year gone by and a new one springing forth,

I am drawn to this concept of being content but not complacent.

I can honestly say 25 was one of the best years so far.

Nothing extraordinary happened. But I was awed and surprised about how happy just the ordinary can be sometimes.

But I still don't feel quite settled.

Quite accomplished.

Quite OK with it all.

I still want a lot.

even though I don't really have a plan, or a specific dream or list of wants.

I just have that feeling, ya know? That feeling of wanting something else or something new.

And before this year.

I would have stressed about that feeling.

Tried to pin point what it meant. (does it mean I want a husband, a new job, to move, to save the world, to go back to school...?)

But now that I get that sometimes waiting and being patient doesn't necessarily mean you are treading water.

Even though I didn't move mountains this past year, I still evolved, challenged myself and grew.

I hope 26:

is just as peaceful with the present as 25 was

As fun and unexpected as 25 was

offers more challenges and growth like 25 did

allows for more clarity and direction like 25 did

offers more ways to love and grow my relationships as 25 did

teaches me that LETTING GO is sometimes the best way to move forward like 25 did

I hope new doors open for me this 26th year

That I will let fear fall to the weigh side like I have been learning to do this past 25th year

forces me in, some way, to try something new, whatever that may be...

Cheers to 26!

Birthday Wishes

2011-06-16T06:50:00.000-07:00

I turn 26 this month.

I will get into a deep post later.

But while I try to avoid the thoughts of 'yet another year gone bye..'

Let discuss the superficial aspects that surround the day of our births: the wants.

I want:

the Rebecca Minkoff Cupid Bag

the Rebecca Minkoff Beau Clutch

and

the iPad

Happy birthday wants to me!

books

2011-06-14T12:38:00.000-07:00

I get emails quite a lot about books. I guess because I talk about them a lot.

Anyways a lot of you have asked what my top five books are.

That is REALLY hard seeing how my amazon wish list has 85 books currently waiting to be purchased (I think it's time to invest in a kindle)

But for the sake of trying to answer your question.

I will try to choose my top 5 books I think are must reads.

1. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

"Inside the snow globe on my father's desk, there was a penguin wearing a red-and-white-striped scarf. When I was little my father would pull me into his lap and reach for the snow globe. He would turn it over, letting all the snow collect on the top, then quickly invert it. The two of us watched the snow fall gently around the penguin. The penguin was alone in there, I thought, and I worried for him. When I told my father this, he said, 'Don't worry Susie; he has a nice life. He's trapped in a perfect world."

Now. Before you stop reading the rest of my list right now because you see this one has taken the number one spot, you have to TOTALLY disregard the horrific movie based on the book with Marky Mark as the star. It is just awful and doesn't do a hint of justice for this amazing book.

I have loved this book since it came out in 2004. When I was in high school. and I have probably read it twelve times since and weep every.single.time.

I remember reading a part in the book where Susie meets her grandfather and they dance together. It sounds lame. But I remember vividly crying and reading this one part about five times.

And that is why I LOVE this book more than any other.

It is written in the most beautiful way possible. You know how song lyrics just sometimes move you? Well that is how I feel about this book, it is written so beautifully that it just moves you. And on top of that I think it is amazing that the author was able to write in such a romantically/beautiful/haunting way about the most horrific subject: murder.

Read it.

2. Atonement

Again. Another amazingly beautiful book. It is just written SO well. And it is a tough story. But it's a tough story you stick with due to the plot development/character development and for the authors ability to weave in a deep life issue: Atonement and what that really means into a story that affects the life of each character in very different ways.

3. The Kite Runner

I WEEPED reading this book.

It was so hard for me to get into but once I did, I was totally invested. It is just such a sweet sweet story about love and friendship that is SO moving. And along with a story of love and friendship, the author is able to weave in the history and turmoil of Afghanistan through his characters.

4. Harry Potter

I mean obviously.

I have a dog named after this series.

They are incredibly well written. and everytime I reread them I am just in awe over the details Rowling was able to come up with. On top of amazing plots and characters she weaves in deep social issues and moral issues. I just really appreciate her creativity and gift for writing.

5. The Virgin Suicides

Yea. It's a weird morbid subject. But what I really love about this book is how the author doesn't explain the why and how of the 5 sisters, who are the center of this story, suicides. He takes the perspective of a middle school neighborhood boy who describes the lure and awe of these five sisters and the haunting events that lead to their unraveling.

Operation...

2011-06-09T11:50:00.000-07:00

Go to the Gym in the AM time.

I am STRUGGLING getting to the gym after work.

This always happens when springs rolls around.

My life just picks up more so than in the winter.

And my after work schedule gets pretty busy.

Leaving me with less time to go to the gym.

and the gym is important to me.

For my mind and my butt.

Not to mention, I actually enjoy spin class and miss it when I cant attend (yea you read that right... I just said enjoy.)

So operation get my but out of bed at 5 am commences Monday.

(image via Pinterest)

Check back to see how it goes.....

Ok I promise this will be my last post on: What I learned from Six Feet Under

2011-05-31T12:30:00.000-07:00

But I just want to get this out while it is flowing through my brain.

Again, obviously, I loved this series. I am a sucker for good TV. I mean sure I can watch my fair share of crap TV but really I would rather read a book than zone out to the damn Kardashians. But when a good TV show comes along one with interesting plots, creative writing, and uber developed characters, I'm a sucker.

(LOST... how I miss you)

So anyways.

Yea.

I'm still thinking about the finale of SFU.

And

I came away with another little life lesson from this show: You don't always get answers in life.

I think our society sort of programs us to think the opposite of the above statement. The immediacy of technology and having ALL at our fingertips has sort of geared us to believe (whether we consciously realize it or unconsciously absorb it) that answers abound for everything and they are there for the taking.

When I think at the base of life and being human, this just isn't true.

Even if we encase ourselves in this little bubble of technological knowledge that makes it easy to believe that we CAN know it all, really, you cant.

And because of this most of us are plagued by some questions that we will, our whole lives, struggle to accept cant be answered.

*Spoilers below*

I was just thinking through the series last night before bed. and had forgotten that we never really knew who Maya's father was. Sure Nate was her father, he took on that role and loved her as a father.

But biologically was she his?

And then we never got a clear answer on whether or not Lisa's brother in law killed her.

Obviously the most frustrating part of that whole story line was knowing he had in some way been involved whether he was Maya's father or just Lisa's longtime lover or her actual killer but he was there that day.

Yet we never find out what really happened.

Nate never finds out.

It is never resolved.

*Spoilers Over, Read On...*

I mean I think as frustrating as not having answers to some things in life is, It is the beauty of this life too in a way.

It just allows for that staple of mystery to be ever present.

And I think that mystery is necessary to keep us grounded to the fact that life isn't a stable thing.

Mortality is a real thing.

Technology sort of strangles that out. Takes you farther away from thoughts of mortality. Puts it all in your hands.

When really life just isn't in your hands. and it can be really sad and frustrating and great and fantastic.

But it's fragile.

And the questions make you acutely aware of that and your mortality too.

I guess I learned a lot about living in the face of death through this series.

I'm appreciative of that reminder.

So yea... that's my final deep thoughts on Six Feet Under.

Netflix it.

you wanna know a secret? I spent my whole life being scared. Scared of not being ready, of not being right, of not being who I should be. And where did it get me?

2011-05-30T19:10:00.000-07:00

I just finished the last episode in the series: Six Feet Under.

It is by far the best tv series I have ever watched. I wrote about my love for Ruth as a character. And really, I loved all the characters of this series.

I loved the honesty that the creator Alan Ball conveyed on just how hard life is. How hopeless it can be. How joyful it can be. And how at the same time, the two are intermingled. Intermingled to the point that they create, well, Life. Because what is life than just joy and hurt mixed together through our relationships, expectations and experiences.

you wanna know a secret?

I spent my whole life being scared.

Scared of not being ready, of not being right, of not being who I should be.

And where did it get me?

I loved this quote Nate said to Claire as she weighed the decision to take the next step in her life.

I think a lot of us spend a lot of time being afraid of life.

Well, at least I do.

But what this series taught me (as stupid as that sounds, yep learning from TV over here...) is that life is just that, damn scary. It just is. Life is uncertain.

But it just keeps going. And in the midst of it, to really live well, you gotta confront the scary stuff. You gotta wrestle with it. And that is hard, and painful.

But thats life.

And it's worth it.

Because one day it's gonna end.

And You only get what is with you right now. The people and the places and the experiences right now.

It may change and look different tomorrow, in a month, in a year... But it's still just right now.

So just go with it (whether your happy, sad, scared, hopeful, mad, excited...)

and feel it.

Just walk through the fear (or whatever emotion).

That's life.

....

And those are my deep thoughts on my time watching Six Feet Under.

Netflix it.

(Oh and I really dug Billy's Tshirt in this episode: What Would Jesus Bomb?)

Checking In, Checking Out.

2011-05-12T09:45:00.000-07:00

Hey!

Long time no type. (that was really cheesy...)

Well I just wanted to check in.

I have been MIA for a little while.

And I wanted to just

say:

I may be MIA for a bit longer.

I just need a break.

Honestly.

I mean I guess I could recount my days meticulously through word if you all really wanted to read that.

But that just isn't who I am.

I don't think it is healthy to relay every detail of my life right as it is happening.

I think it is good to experience things in the moment, think on them and their affect on your life.

It is good to just experience life as it comes and not worry about projecting it to the world minute by minute

(bc really who cares for that?)

And I am sort of all over the place with my focus on here and in my life in general.

So I just need to live my life.

And maybe I will pop in if I need to 'document' something I feel is important.

I will be back.

Who knows when.

But I will.

In the meantime.

You can still find me live and active (probably overly) on Twitter.

Much Love to You All!

(via Pinterest)

Big Pictures

2011-05-04T10:06:00.000-07:00

Ive been thinking a lot about people who think in 'Big Picture' mentality.

You know, the, Here is Where I want to be in 5-10-15 years thinkers.

The people who are always 5 steps ahead.

Always thinking and working for the next thing.

I am not one of these people.

I just came to that conclusion after 3 years of trying to force myself to think in the above terms.

and it made me totally miserable.

And really stressed out.

I mean, I get the need for goals and vision.

(although, if I'm being honest, I really struggle with this too. But am working on it.)

But I don't buy into the thought of always scurrying around trying to advance or 'go get' the next thing on my 10 yr plan (Doesn't really work for me since I don't have a 10 year plan anyways.) or trying to force my life to fit into a carved out mold of what I think it should be.

I have really been thinking about the world as of late.

I mean there is a lot going on and a lot to think about.

I was talking with friends last night over a great dinner about how, when we were younger, we had this vision of what life 'should' be. All of us at the table have parents who have lived and worked in the same town their whole lives and been around the same people their whole lives. The dad works. The mom maybe works. They got married had kids. Did the family vacay every year. Christmas dinners ect... and there you have it, life as we know it.

Very simple.

But that isn't really what I (personally) want and over our conversation we talked about how the world is a totally different place now then when our parents embarked on their life, the life that we grew up knowing.

And does that kind of life really exist anymore for people our age?

I don't think so.

I mean maybe for some.

But our world is crazy.

Like really crazy.

and the above life described is rare and far between now a days from what I see.

And that is ok with me.

I just think the fact that our world is so volatile and ever changing that, well, the life that we grew up knowing may not be a reality for most of us.

We may not get married in our twenties.

Have babies right after the ring is on our finger.

Have our husbands work while we stay home.

Live in the same town our entire life.

Have enough saved to go on vacations and send our kids through college.

Live a nice tidy white picket fence existent.

And you know what?

I'm ok with that.

I honestly don't think I want that.

Who knows if I will get married.

And you know how I feel about kids.

And I mean will I make a million bucks... In this economy... no probably not.

And while I think that goals and dreams and desires are good.

I also think realizing that maybe life has changed DRASTICALLY since the above days means we sort of have to change our perspective on where life is taking us. Realize that relying on an outdated model to fashion our lives after just isn't gonna work anymore.

All that to say.

I have finally gotten to a place where I can honestly say, most of the time, I am content and happy just living each day how it comes.

Im not striving for something that may not ever happen or that I may not (if I'm honest) even really want.

There is something to be said for

realizing the time we live in and being content right here and right now.

And if it happens it happens. If it doesn't, well, it doesn't. And so you just gotta get ok with right now. Because that is all you really have anyways.

History

2011-05-02T07:24:00.000-07:00

I feel like we have witnessed a lot of history in our time.

But especially during the first half of 2011.

-Egypt

-Libya

- Syria

- The rest of the Middle East unrest

-Royal Wedding

- Tornados

- Osama

- The mental break of Charlie Sheen

I mean that is a lot of stuff to take in.

A lot.

I am sort of on overload when it comes to breaking news after lasts weeks weather events.

So last night when I got home around 9pm and turned on the tv I was FOR REAL convinced Obama was about to announce the world was ending.

Seriously.

And you know what?

I wasnt that surprised.

I was surprised though when I read on twitter (before the prez even made it out to the podium) that Osama was dead. I was excited and sort of in awe like most.

And if you arent on twitter, you really should be.

I was cracking up over everyone's humor and excitement last night.

I even sent up a twitter toast followed by other pictures of people toasting me back.

It was fun.

(my twitter toast sent out last night.)

I dont really know my deep thoughts on this event yet.

like I said, Im on news over load.

But what I do know is that we live during a very unique, weird, kinda frightening, sureal time in history.

Dont let it pass you bye.

Happy Weekend

2011-04-29T12:14:00.000-07:00

What a crazy, bizarre, sad week.

If you are interested in helping with relief efforts here in Alabama. I urge you to go to here. I work very closely with this organization a few times a month and they really are the best resource for volunteering.

Today I am thankful for:

- My life and safety

- Prince Harry. (as they are saying around the blogsphere: Keep Calm Harry Is Still Single.)

I realize one of those is quite serious and the other rather frivolous.

But hey,

Im just being honest about what is going on in my head.

Im still sort of reeling from the events of this week.

Sort of on information overload.

This weekend I plan on finding the best place to help out with relief efforts

Going to an Avetts concert

and spending time with friends.

I hope you have a lovely weekend with loved ones.

I leave you with this since, again, I am spending another weekend in the company of the Avett bros.

I thought it was sort of a good message to remind us all to love the ones around us.

4.27.11

2011-04-28T07:25:00.000-07:00

I know everyone one is talking about the awful weather that hit here yesterday.

I know everyone will be writing about it.

I just wanted to write it down here to remember.

I woke up at about 5 am to tornado sirens.

I have never been one to freak out over weather.

So I don't automatically go into protection mode.

But when I heard the sirens I flipped the TV on and saw that the sirens weren't meant for my area of Alabama.

I turned the TV off and tried to go back to bed.

Next I knew,

it sounded and looked like a hurricane outside my window.

We lost power.

and I got ready in the dark.

When I stepped outside to head to work there were trees and power lines down everywhere.

It took me an hour and a half to go the 5 miles it takes me to get to work.

My work let most people go around 1:30 due to the pending threat of disaster that the weatherman was reporting.

I stayed because a huge project needed to get done.

I wasn't able to keep up with the Cullman tornado or Tuscaloosa one.

I just heard snippets of what was happening.

At 5:45 our boss told us to "make a commitment because the storm is coming."

I decided to leave because Potter (my dog) was home alone.

The reports on the radio were the first news I had heard that wasn't hearsay or bits and pieces pulled together.

apparently a F5 was headed straight for the middle of Birmingham.

I have NEVER in my life driven as fast as I have to get home.

It was so eery out too.

No rain.

No thunder.

No lightening.

Just wind and a green sky.

I made it home.

Still no power.

So I had no way of knowing what was happening.

I grabbed my pup and headed straight for my basement.

I stayed there waiting it out.

About an hour later I touched base with my roommate and met up with her and a few other friends.

They had power and news coverage which made me feel safer. Knowing what is going on is a good good thing.

Thankfully Birmingham city center was spared. But the outlying area was hit as well as Tuscaloosa and Cullman.

I couldn't really sleep last night.

I was just really freaked out.

I am so thankful to be safe.

But this has also made me realize the importance of a plan and protection.

Being home alone with no news or definite reports made me feel so vulnerable.

THANK GOD FOR TWITTER.

That was my only source of news I had as I waited it out in my basement and you all who are my twitter friends were so helpful in keeping me informed!

Anyways.

I plan on getting emergency supplies together soon.

I am also thinking about investing in a gun.

I know that may sound crazy to most of you.

But yesterday made me think about what would happen if a widespread disaster occurred that knocked out my power and resources for longer than two days.

What would I do?

People get crazy during disasters. You just never know.

I'm a single girl living far from family.

I have to be able to take care of myself and yesterday rattled me.

Again.

I just wanted to write this down to remember.

And to stress the importance of a plan of action.

I didn't have one.

Thankfully nothing happened to me.

But you just never know.

you have to be as prepared as you can for something like this. Or something worse.

As James Spann says: " Get to your safe place." In other words... Don't F around.

Get a plan.

Happy Weekend, Happy Easter

2011-04-22T06:30:00.000-07:00

I love Easter.

And not for candy or a new dress.

But for Jesus.

I love Him.

He is good.

I love Him so much.

I hope you do too.

I get really overwhelmed when I really meditate on how Jesus loves us.

All of us.

Even if you were the only person on earth, He would have still died for you.

And even if you were only one person, and you never accepted His love,

He STILL would have died for you!

Because He loves you. Even if you don't love Him back.

But when this really hits you. The reality of his love, Well...

You can't not love Him back.

You are the apple of His eye. Even if you dont even know it!

But I hope with all my heart you come to know how carefully he cares for you. How deeply He loves you.

It's an irresistible love. And when you know it, you'll never look back.

On this Easter weekend I leave you with this:

A song by one of my most favorite artists.

It is the most beautifully written tune I know that describes what Jesus did for us.

(hey Charlotte friends in the video! Miss you people!!)

(the lyrics are also below)

Though the Earth Cried out for blood
Satisfied her hunger was
Her billows calmed on raging seas
for the souls on men she craved

Sun and moon from balcony
Turned their head in disbelief
Their precious Love would taste the sting
disfigured and disdained

On Friday a thief
On Sunday a King
Laid down in grief
But awoke with keys
Of Hell on that day
The first born of the slain
The Man Jesus Christ
Laid death in his grave

So three days in darkness slept
The Morning Sun of righteousness
But rose to shame the throes of death
And over turn his rule

Now daughters and the sons of men
Would pay not their dues again
The debt of blood they owed was rent
When the day rolled a new

On Friday a thief
On Sunday a King
Laid down in grief
But awoke holding keys
To Hell on that day
The first born of the slain
The Man Jesus Christ
Laid death in his grave

On Friday a thief
On Sunday a King
Laid down in grief
But awoke with keys
Of Hell on that day
The first born of the slain
The Man Jesus Christ
Laid death in his grave

He has cheated
Hell and seated
Us above the fall
In desperate places
He paid our wages
One time once and for all

Happy Easter Friends.

Have a lovely weekend!

Im just gonna put tis out there as I process it in my head

2011-04-20T07:53:00.000-07:00

Does anyone else think church is awkward?

I mean I love church and the concept of church.

I'm not talking about awkward on the fundamental level of what is being taught and the whole Jesus thing.

I think church *Can* be awkward on the whole community thing.

I grew up in Kentucky.

I went to the same church my whole life.

It wasn't a 'mega' church.

I mean I'm from a small town.

our 'mega' churches aren't really even 'mega' churches when compared to Joel O'Steen or whatever.

Anyways.

So I really thrived in my home church. I met my best friends in children's church went to youth group with them. Spent most of my time with these people and this group all through middle school and high school.

Then I moved away to college.

Which is another place that is a breeding ground and an atmosphere that fosters community.

I didn't really 'need' a church community because I had such a thriving one at school.

But now I am trying to get plugged into a church.

and it is hard.

like, awkwardly hard.

To me it sometimes resembles a grown up sorority.

taking place in the playing field of these 'Mega' churches which can be overwhelming.

I might ad, I go to two churches.

Yea call me crazy.

They are both very different in style.

Have great fundamental teaching

and both MEGA churches.

One offers over 800 small groups.

THAT IS OVERWHELMING.

I have tried over 5 at least. and each time I just don't feel a connection.

And it just ends up being a burden rather than a life giving time.

But then I also feel totally disconnected when I just show up on Sunday with out knowing anyone around me in the huge auditorium they call a sanctuary.

So I keep giving these small groups a try.

Hoping to make a connection.

I found success this winter.

I went to a small group with two dear friends.

And I really loved the people.

And I loved the study.

But it was still awkward to me for these reasons:

- Small groups aren't like Sunday school where you are in a class with the same people for years and years. growing together in the same time of life and continuing on together.

- Small groups are usually done in semesters. So you are probably with these people for 6 wks. Just enough time to get to know these people and feel comfortable opening up. And POOF! the semester is over.

- And if they aren't done in semesters then that means you hop into a group sometimes right when they start which can be amazing and other times after years of one group being together which can be awkward.

- And once the semester is over, what are you supposed to do? Just hop into another group out of the 800? and start the awkward cycle all over again?

Even though I felt a part of this group and am SO thankful that this door was opened because I have gotten so much out of our study.

I still feel a little disconnected.

Like I cant Really be myself with these people.

And that they don't 'really' want to be themselves in this group setting.

I also feel out of the loop because these people are very connected to an inner group of 'high up' people in the 'mega' church which I am not. So when the name dropping starts. I get all uncomfortable and feel out of the loop.

That old feeling of being misplaced and alone creeps in.

I am a people person.

I THRIVE off of connection.

Real connection.

And it baffles me when there are over 800 groups + more when you add in my other church where people have the hardest time opening up and being real.

I don't want this to come off as a negative post. I see the beauty in small groups. And I have LOVED mine this semester for the most part.

These are just things that are swirling through my mind as I contemplate where I fit in my church and in this community where I live.

Dear Tall Dark and Handsome Man

2011-04-19T09:19:00.000-07:00

That I walked into the gym with yesterday,

You are by far the best looking dude I have seen in a long time.

Too bad I was looking pretty rough in a crumpled cotton tank that I found stuffed in the back of my dresser drawer. Not to mention the unflattering Nike Tempo shorts I was sporting to complete the ill fitted outfit.

You were looking nice though as you held the door for me on my way in. Nice slacks, button down and tie. Too bad I was to overcome by your chiseled face that failed to see the rug in front of me which caused me to lose my grace and stumble to the counter to swipe my card.

I couldn't look back at your beautiful face from there on out.

Although, I did hold hope that you would show up to my spin class. I got there real early. Grabbed a bike in the back next to the door (just in case I couldn't hang and needed to dip out early). But alas, you never showed. I guess your more of the body building kind instead of the disco-tech-esque spinning class kind.

Nonetheless. I rather enjoyed my Lance Armstrong- clad in spandex- wannabe- spin instructor. I felt like I was up in Da Club with the beats he had coming out of his pod for each interval (he really likes Katy Perry and apparently I do too, because I almost caught myself singing I KISSED A GIRL AND I LIKED IT at the top of my lungs a couple of times.). Along with dimmed lights, it was the perfect night club setting minus the glow sticks and glitter (Not that I frequent a lot of clubs, I just have a good mental imagine from watching The Real World, those kids love Da Clubs). I really feel like this Lance Armstrong-clad in spandex- wannabe- spin instructor was fostering a perfect gym/nightclub setting for us to meet and then maybe swap digits ( The Real World kids do that too. Ya know, swap digits and stuff like that).

Damn.

Too bad.

Maybe I'll see you during my next date with the gym. I'll be sure to wear more spandex and less ill fitted clothing and I will keep my balance this time too.

Caroline

Happy Weekend

2011-04-15T08:28:00.000-07:00

I've been MIA this week. So sorry.

But hey we made it to Friday.

What are your plans?

Tonight I want to see this.

And tomorrow I am running a quick 5k race.

And then my evening is open for something fun and exciting.

So lets get on with the Thankfulness:

This week Im thankful For:

- Really, really good and loyal friends. The older I get the more I appreciate authentic real friendships and the more I value a small handful of close friends I can trust and invest in.

- Payday

- Umbrellas

- Netflix

- Makeup

- Kitchens

And I leave with this cover done by Seth Avett that a friend sent me yesterday. I think I can 'Officially' claim the Avett Brothers as my most favorite band. I just cant get enough.

Yes I'm On a Spending Freeze

2011-04-12T06:05:00.000-07:00

But

I am in need of dining room chairs

and

Outdoor Furniture.

And once this freeze is over

Im liking these two options from World Market.

priced pretty well in my opinion.

For my dining room table:

The Jackson Metal Tub Chair

And for the deck:

Trestle Glen All Weather Wicker

Back to the $ Freeze.

Drunk Sailor

2011-04-11T12:02:00.000-07:00

(image via pintrest)

I just went to lunch.
And after looking through my mail and trying to get my life in some sort of order,

I have put myself on a SERIOUS spending freeze.

Sometimes I spend money like I'm a drunk sailor or something.

And I know that I have had to spend more money lately because of my house disaster.

And not having a kitchen has forced me to eat out for practically every meal

which is hard on the wallet too.

But I just feel like once I start to get one area of my life in order,

another area blows up throwing me off balance yet again.

Before this whole kitchen thing

I was really getting on the swing of changing my eating pattern to a more vegan fare.

I had settled into my new house.

I had the bill cycle in order

and had my budget all worked out after having it get out of whack when I moved.

And I had a lovely amount put away in my savings account.

Then the damn kitchen fell apart and with it, my house, budget and eating habits, along with a depletion in my savings.

I am just a hot mess over here.

So since I'm nearing the end (hopefully) of the repairs. I am hoping to get back to normal.

And in the meantime I have put myself on a strict NO SPENDING moratorium.

Here are my rules:

- NO SPENDING on anything other than groceries and necessary toiletries.

- $20 of 'free money' per week to spend on whatever I want,, i.e. cocktails, dinner out, books, movies, music... and each week I will take that $20 out in cash and leave my debit card at home.

- The ONLY exception to this rule is a bathing suit, shorts and concert tickets. I really need a new Bsuit and shorts for the summer and if I find something that is reasonable I can get it. And I am a concert junky. If good tickets to a show I really want to see come available then I can buy them.

By doing this I am hoping to cut out the frivolous spending that eats away at my pay check and hopefully start to build back up my savings that got used for repairs to the kitchen.

And hopefully it will help me reevaluate the things I have to have, Want to save for, and Dont need really at all.

God help me. :/

Happy Weekend

2011-04-08T10:29:00.000-07:00

I am so out of it today. I think it's allergies.

Anyways.

At least it is Friday right?

I dont have much planned but what I do have is gonna be good.

Tomorrow I have to wake up at 6:30 am. On A Satuday!

It better be worth it.

Hopefully I will get some sun too tomorrow afternoon.

I need it.

Let's get thankful:

This week I'm Thankful for:

- Conan

- Netflix

- My parents. They really are the best

- Emoticons: Dont be skeered to use em. They rock. :)

I leave you with song.

I used to JAM OUT to this my senior year in college. and it randomly cam on my pod this morning.
(then I found this youtube video to embed and started cracking up over how CHEESY it is. ENJOY)

Nostalga. It's a good thing.

Have a Lovely weekend.

If this doesn't convince you to start watching 6 Feet Under... Well, then nothing will

2011-04-06T20:20:00.000-07:00

This is Ruth

She is the mother on the TV show Six Feet Under.

Which is not on TV anymore.

I am in the middle of it from Netflix.

Ruth is the most EPIC character on TV I have ever watched.

For real.

You should start watching.

Because if you dont you are seriously missing out on one of the most hilarious, complex characters ever written.

Seriously.

Here are some clips to hopefully intrigue you enough to RENT THIS SERIES!

The clips dont do her justice. Just rent the series. You wont regret it.

(sorry for the subtitles)

I would like to preface this post by first stating that:

2011-04-05T15:04:00.000-07:00

At this moment in time I am a single-white-female. My thoughts (which have not been set in concrete) could easily change in the future when my single-white-female status changes.

That being said.

I have been having weird thoughts about not wanting to have children.

I know this is strange because again, I am a single-white-female and this train of thought really isn't even a train my thoughts should be on at this point in time.

But for some reason my mind has been wandering there.

I really appreciate kids.

I actually really like kids. And they really like me too most of the time.

and I really appreciate parents.

I mean I have a brother who has 5 kids under the age of 11.

And another brother who takes care of 14+ street kids in Honduras (he is a parent by default).

It's not like the thought of 'I don't want kids' runs in the family or anything.

This one is all my own.

Maybe it has crept in because I wasn't the typical southern sorority girl looking for a diamond come my senior year of college.

I have never dreamed about my wedding or married life.

Let alone having children.

I mean if you're not daydreaming about marriage you're probably not dreaming about your unborn babes names either.

I mean sure, I guess, I want to get married. I honestly went through a season last year where I thought something was wrong with me because EVERYONE around me was tying the knot and I wasn't.

But as I really searched my heart and made progress on ME I have come to realize:

I am just fine right where I am. With just me.

Sure sometimes I get lonely.

and having a crush is fun.

but

Honestly, when I think back to my worrying self last year. I was worried about getting married for the sake of not being lonely. And you cant get married to cure loneliness.

See? Progress.

I have worked on those loneliness issues and now realize MARRIAGE IS NOT THE ANSWER.

All that to say,

I never bought into the train of thought most girls I know were on where you get a degree, get married and then have a baby.

(not saying that is wrong. I have lovely friends who had this happen and they are FANTASTIC).

And now that none of that has happened (which I am thankful for).

I really enjoy being single.

I love that I get to do what I want when I want.

And I haven't sworn off marriage because I think it would be nice to have a partner to do all these great things with too.

Although, I don't really want to rush the marriage process.

But kids...

I just dont know.

I mean I am in AWE of parents.

SERIOUSLY!

How the heck do you do it?

I mean financially,

emotionally

physically?

HOW?

I just cant EVER ( at this point remember: single-white-female) imagine wanting to trade my, concert loving-lets go out on the town- lets catch a plane to somewhere- I want to buy those shoes today self - for total submission to another being who relies on me for the well being of their life.

I just cant imagine.

Im too selfish right now.

I cant imagine trading in Avett shows for ABC's.

Late night cocktails for Mac N Cheese.

Meaningless/meaningful conversations with random groups of people for " can you say: MA MA?"

I just cant.

But I admire this so much in those of you who want this.

Am I missing a gene?

Will this come once I have a ring on my finger and someone to love?

I suppose this single-white-female is Undecided.

Observations

2011-04-04T06:52:00.000-07:00

If you plan on drinking, and drinking a lot. Wear underwear. No one wants to see your feminine bits on the dance floor. And even if you don't plan on drinking enough to allow you to forget you are sans undies and shaking it on the dance floor for all to see, it's best to err on the side of caution and just wear panties. You may not worry about your dignity but my eyes would like to keep theirs.

If you are a high schooler on a date at a concert. That is cute. You're so nervous I actually find it endearing. What I don't find endearing is your nervous chatter about prom. I mean prom is cool and all, I guess. Just don't discuss it at a concert surrounded by people trying to listen to music. But like I said, your attempts at planning a 'cool' date is cute.

If your are in college and at a concert, It is not ok to get rip roaring drunk, grind and makeout with your boyfriend/girlfriend and then to shout loudly over the music about 'How completely wasted you are'. Take that shiz back to the frat house.

Observations from my weekend.

Happy Weekend

2011-04-01T06:05:00.000-07:00

Ah, Friday

Hello again.

This week has really been quite dreary and slow.

I mean it probably is due to the rainy and cold weather that has greeted me each morning as I made my way to work.

But bright skies are ahead.

And, IT'S FREAKIN APRIL.

Like holy cow.

This year is flying.

Well.

What do you have planned this weekend?

Tonight I am SO EXCITED.

Im headed to Tuscaloosa to see My Favorites,

The Avett Brothers.

I am actually seeing them 3 times this month. Yep 3.

And here's the thing.

I always liked their music.

Then I got tickets to see them at the Ryman and I was thinking 'Meh, I could give or take on these tickets.'

But HOT DAMN

I am so glad I went.

Because, seriously, they put on one of the best shows.

really.

If you are a fan and have never seen them. Grab tickets.

and if you don't know who they are, well start listening and then go see a show.

You wont be disappointed.

And the show in Tuscaloosa holds an extra dose of excitement because Band of Horses is playing tonight too!

I mean, I dig their music, and I know that after see them live I will be even more endeared to them.

Because that is the thing about me, I may like your music flowing through my earbuds, but if I see you live and if you are as good (or most likely) better than that sound on my pod, well then, Im sold.

So today,

Im thankful for

Music.

Well, and, Scott Avett's beard.

And Joe Kwon's sweet moves on the stage with his cello.

Have a Lovely Weekend.

I leave you with a taste of some of my favorites from the band I adore.

Think About It...

2011-03-30T12:10:00.000-07:00

"We cannot keep going from shock to trance on the issue of energy security, rushing to propose action when gas prices rise, then hitting the snooze button when they fall again."

- Barack Obama

Think about it

A Little Color For Your Toes

2011-03-29T07:57:00.000-07:00

BOOM!

Spring on ya feet!

Don't you want them? I do!

It's Monday again

2011-03-28T11:39:00.000-07:00

Omg. This Monday came Way, way too soon. I always psyche myself out on Sunday night and get so revved up about Monday arriving in just a few hours that I never sleep well. Not to mention it stormed all night and Potter is afraid of storms, a lot of barking ensued.

How was your weekend?

Mine was great. I mean great as in, I didn't really do anything super out of the ordinary, but the ordinary was really great.

Friday I had such a good night with friends. I am SO thankful for the friendships that God has given me. I cherish them and don't take them for granted. Whenever I am with these people I am just thankful. And when you are thankful, I think you enjoy the moment even more.

I spent Saturday recovering from Friday. I was so tired. I parked myself on the couch and watched Parenthood seasons 1 and 2 from beginning to end. Do any of you watch this show? You should! It is so so good!

Sunday I headed to church. Oh so good as always. and then I had my first round of meetings as an advisor for my sorority. I am cracking up that I am at the point, post college, where I am old enough to be an advisor. I am excited to help out. My first Advisor duty: Chaperon the upcoming formal. How hysterical is that?!

Sunday night I headed over to a friends for beer, bbq and basketball. It was a great evening and it helped, just a little that UK made it to the FINAL FOUR!!! I know some of you may be confused at where my loyalty lies when it comes to sports. Is she an Alabama fan? Is she a UK fan? Is she even a fan at all? I will be honest. I cheer for Alabama in football and UK in basketball. I know I know, I need to straighten out my loyalty. But I mean come on... It is just sports right?

Anyways, after dinner I headed home to search for my final four tshirt from the last time UK got this far when I was like in 5th grade or something. I guess I threw it out. I was a bit disappointed I couldn't bust out that vintage gold this year.

It is pretty dreary here today and I have an INSANELY Busy week this week but for now I leave you with this.

It has been stuck in my head all weekend.

Happy Monday

Happy Weekend

2011-03-25T06:05:00.000-07:00

Happy Weekend.

We made it!

Anybody else have a bad case of Spring Fever?

I'm having a hard time staying productive while stuck in my cubbie.

Anyways.

Here is a weeks worth of thankfulness to get you to your weekend:

- Sweetwater 420

- Bee Repellent Spray

- Good dinners with Good friends

- Seeing an old friend, by chance, walk by the restaurant I just happened to be in. It's good to rekindle friendships.

- Insurance

- Shellac Manicures

- The Royal Tannenbaums

- Genesis

And finally, here is my jam of the week for you.

Have a Lovely Weekend

I have issue

2011-03-23T14:20:00.000-07:00

With people bitching, NON STOP, about gas prices. Yes I understand that it is a strain and that $75 at the pump is 'unreal' I really do. But at the same time I do not sympathize with those who consistently moan and groan about the 'Government not doing anything.'

I'm sorry. We are AT WAR in order to provide you with the reasonable gas prices you are willing to pay in order to drive your gas guzzling SUV. Did you hear me? AT WAR. You may not agree with that statement. That is fine, whatever. But look at the most recent facts: The bombing of Libya. I'm sorry, you may believe that we are bombing this country to control Gadhafi from committing further humanitarian crimes. But honestly far worse crimes against humanity have been taking place in Sudan for over 7 yrs. And by god, the US of A did not drop bombs there the moment they heard of these atrocities. Nope. It should be noted that Libya sits on the largest oil reserve in Africa. And if this unrest in Libya continues the oil industry there may come to a halt altogether. Which would drive gas prices in the US sky high.

So do your homework people. Get educated before you complain. And if you are still going to ignore the huge fact that people ARE DYING so you can go to the pump and still have money left over to buy shoes, well then, I guess, Bitch on.

(Stern Carol)

you've been warned.

Added to note: I am aware that there are far more issues that are involving us in war(s) overseas. Although I do believe this is one major factor.

Sometimes I wonder

2011-03-23T08:49:00.000-07:00

Why:

- I really really, I mean Really, hate washing my hair

- I have to sleep with earplugs in order to get a good nights sleep

- Think it is perfectly normal to hit the snooze button 12 times before I actually rise out of bed.

- Why I have a weird love for, James Franco, Jack White and The Big Lebowski

- Why I find the greatest joy and fun when I am at the Ocean yet live nowhere near the ocean. ( I guess a pool is good enough sometimes?)

- Cant seem to get it together when it comes to putting laundry away

- Lose every pair of earrings.

- Have a strange desire to play sports but am not good at sports

- Love football. Not tailgating. (Im trying to learn to love it :/)

- Can Not make a decision on anything to save my life.

Maybe someday someone will find these things lovely and quite endearing.

Just doing a little wondering over here today.

Roots

2011-03-22T08:17:00.000-07:00

(image here)

How are you friends?

How was your weekend?

I took a long weekend.

It was much needed.

I wont lie,

I was supposed to be at the beach this past weekend with my most favorite person.

But the trip had to be cancelled because of my ongoing house situation.

So I was a little bummed.

But I still tried to make the most of the day off and the long nice weekend.

I spent the weekend with good good friends. Some old and some new.

I have been praying for healthy and meaningful friendships for awhile now.

It was something I really lacked when I first graduated college and many dear friends moved away.

It took time.

But I see the fruits of my prayer all around me now.

And you know what else I see?

I see myself as a more compassionate and loving person.

When you are lacking something you learn to appreciate it and grow to be better in that area to other people.

I am also going through a period of transition with relationships.

Some are being torn out by the root.

And it hurts.

I can get so attached.

Unhealthy attachments.

I can be shown red flag after red flag and I ignore it and get more and more entangled in a mess with another person.

I'm tired of it.

And that is a good place to be I think.

Doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

Because when something gets torn out by the root,

It really is painful.

But I am finally to the point where I believe it is worth it.

and necessary.

I am just praying for grace to stay strong and obey when the going gets tough.
I want healthy roots. Strong, healthy, fruit bearing roots.

I hope your weekend was lovely.

I hope your week has started off with a bang!

Much love to you readers!

2011-03-18T06:45:00.000-07:00

Donate at

www.forjapanwithlove.com

Today

2011-03-17T12:36:00.000-07:00

I Wish

I lived in New York City.

I've got an itch for, the Big City and Bright Lights.

(images Via Pintrest)

Where do you wish you were today?

Super 8

2011-03-16T08:09:00.000-07:00

Is anyone else as excited as me to see Super 8?

JJ Abram + Spielberg = Magic.

It sort of reminds me of a classic Spielberg movie like the Goonies (and who doesn't FREAKING love the Goonies) but with a sci-fi JJ Abrams twist!

So excited

Speaking of Sci-Fi are you as into this jam as I am?

I definitely is getting me through my runs.

And because I haven't done one in awhile, an OOTD.

Nothing special. Just a Wednesday, "what the heck do I wear today, I'm not even awake" outfit for you.

Top: Local Boutique

Skirt: Target

Clogs: f21

Kinda frumpy.

Whatevs.

Happy Humpday

Happy Monday Randomness

2011-03-14T08:46:00.000-07:00

My weekend was crazy, tiring but good.

My parents were in town helping with the disaster that is my kitchen/whole downstairs.

And even though they weren't here under the best of circumstances it was sill nice to have them in town.

So let's dive into Monday shall we?

- If you were to ever ask me my opinion on Sears Appliances customer service, I would give them a Big Fat 0! As stated in a previous post, on top of a kitchen disaster, my stackable washer and dryer unit up and died on me after only 5 yrs of magic. (dont buy frigidaire). So I was in the market for a new stackable unit. Decided to upgrade to the nice, shiny, space ship-esque front load appliances. Went to Sears, bought them, set the delivery date for Saturday. Paid extra for the delivery date of Saturday. Saturday rolls around' the washer and dryer are delivered sans the stackable kit that I was never told I needed to buy in order to securely stack them in the laundry room. Anger ensued. Listen, I don't really fume at service people, but Saturday, Stern Carol came out. You better believe that after SEVEN dropped calls and 14 transfers, I ripped Sears Customer Service Line a new one. They damn straight will be giving me that stackable kit for free, plus free service.

Dont mess with Stern Carol.

- My parents, roommate and I had a lovely Greek dinner friday night. But you know who enjoyed it the most?

Carol and her bottle of wine.

As my dad said : Wine makes the soul happy.

- Speaking of Greek, I really want to go to a Greek Orthodox church service. Can I do that? Do they accept non Greeks? Am I too WASP-ish for them?

- I caught up on about 4 unread Vanity Fair Issues. I LOVE this magazine. Great articles. If your into politics, art, hollywood and culture, subscribe.

- Speaking of Vanity Fair. I had a conversation with my dad about the current persecutions of Christians happening in Egypt since the revolution. I am doing some research to be educated on it. But it also prompted me to start thinking about what is going to happen to Egypt post revolution. I don't want to be a pessimist, but I agree with this article's outlook.

- Alabama's governor looks just like Mr. Burns from the Simpsons. It creeps me out.

- Why are they trying to make Shiloh a boy?

- I already miss my parents. I talked with my mom this weekend about how, despite having really great people around me here, I still feel alone. Why does lonliness follow me around like a dark cloud? Im praying about it.

I hope you Monday is looking up.

Friday Thankfulness

2011-03-11T12:15:00.000-08:00

Happy Friday.

I hope today finds you well, with loved one's and in prayer and thought of Japan.

I am always heartbroken when things like this happen. It just seems so overwhelming.

But it is grounding to know I serve a God and King who holds me in the palm his hands and calls me the apple of his eye.

And I am most thankful for that today.

When I woke up this morning to all of the news coverage I was immediately reminded of a song by Mandi Mapes written after the Haiti Earthquake.

I couldn't find a video online but below are the lyrics and you can download the song from iTunes.

In Your arms
is where I want to be
when my world
comes crashing down on me
so hold me close
keep me Yours always
bid me, break me, be my rock
for now and all my days

whom have I
when my heart begins to fail
when sorrow fills the streets
and sounds of death prevail
Jesus is my hope
and I know He stills the wind
so take my very life away
as long as I get Him

my soul longs
for the day I'll see Your face
when sin and death will pass
and tears are wiped away
so let the sky fall down
and earth and cities quake
and I'll say of my God and King
Lord, blessed be Your name

I will be back soon

2011-03-10T07:41:00.001-08:00

Things in my world are a bit of a wreck.

Literally.

I talked a wee bit in a previous post about some kitchen pipe and plumbing issues.

Well the issue is way more extensive than I first thought.

Lets just say the floors are gone, cabinets gone and that isn't even touching the surface of the damage.

I had my first panic attack in months yesterday.

It was real ugly. I lost it at work.

And thankfully I work with funny people who offered a Xanax and an office for me to close the door to try and breath.

All of this should have been caught in my home inspection.

Obviously it wasn't

So on top of damage

I am having to deal with contractors, insurance agents, and lawyers.

Overwhelmed.

And then to really add icing to the cake, my washer and dryer broke (its a stackable unit).

$800 to fix it.

yep, I'll be buying a new one this weekend.

I don't want to bitch and moan. These things happen.

It is all part of owning a home.

(and I still, despite all of this, don't regret buying it)

But it has just been overwhelming and panic inducing trying to deal with it by myself all while at work.

And I got real bummed because I have now had to cancel, not one, but TWO beach trips I had planned this summer.

Again, It will all be fine. It really will. What do they say: "This too shall pass".

I mean it's just one of those things that sucks but that has to be dealt with.

Thankfully my mom came in last night and my dad is headed down today to hopefully make sense of the gibberish the contractors, plumbers and other workers are saying to me.

So I may be MIA for a bit.

I don't have a lot on my mind other than, work- I have no kitchen- work- I have no kitchen.

So bare with me.

I will be back soon.

Hopefully with an upgraded kitchen and a winning outlook.

Happy Fat Tuesday!

2011-03-08T09:26:00.000-08:00

I love the Easter Season.

I am completely overcome when I think about Jesus and the Cross.

I am not catholic.

Actually quite the opposite.

I grew up in a church that is very non traditional.

But I have family and friends who are catholic.

And I have always been drawn to the beauty and reverence their traditions and ceremonies invoke.

Hence why I have picked up the tradition of the Lenten season.

I choose to participate in Lent because I want to take time out of my life to reflect, during this season, on His death and deep love for me. (Ephesians 3:17-19)

It is an important and personal decision I made.

But I think a lot of people get confused about Lent.

Especially if you did not grow up practicing this tradition.

I loved what my Friend Legally Fab wrote today about the practice of Lent.

I think it can serve as a tutorial of sorts for people wanting to practice Lent for the right reasons,

and maybe a correction to those who don't take it as a reverent and serious season.

Read it.

I am choosing to give something up. Only because it will aid in deepening my walk with Christ.

I am also adding something.

My cute friend Chelsea told me how last Lenten season she wrote down 40 verses and read and meditated on a verse a day.

I loved this idea!

So, for the next 40 days look for a verse at the bottom of each post.

Hopefully it will encourage you all!

Happy Fat Tuesday!

I hope there is King Cake in your future!

Happy Monday

2011-03-07T10:14:00.000-08:00

Happy Monday to you all!

Last week really did me in.

I was just totally overwhelmed.

But please go read this.(it's like she wrote down exactly what is churning through my brain.)

It is good.

And listen to this too.
Im learning a lot about trusting.
And it seems that wherever I turn, the Lord is pushing the message of trust and obedience in my face.
I am open to it.
It is a good good thing.

I hope if you take the time to listen to that message. It blesses you.
Romans 8:28

Again, happy Monday.

Happy Weekend

2011-03-04T06:05:00.001-08:00

Well I was planning on heading home this weekend to visit my family.

But I need to get my home here in order.

I am telling you this week has been a whirlwind.

I plan on laying low this weekend.

Getting back into my regular routine.

A dose of Thankfulness, here we go...

- This giant rabbit, because how could that not make you happy!

- A good boss.

- Paul McDonald and his beard. (I have never watched an episode of Idol but you better believe I YouTube him the day after just to hear that voice, see the beard + shining white teeth.)

- Downton Abbey (if your into PBS and period things, Google it.)

- WARM WEATHER

- Grapefruit

- James Franco

- Gchat

- Running inspiration

- Sleep

Yesterday I had this weird introspective day.

Ever have one of those?

Well anyways. I had this on repeat along with a couple of other slow jams.

So I leave you with this for the the weekend.

I hope you all have a lovely weekend!

I must apologize

2011-03-02T08:07:00.000-08:00

For all the grammar issues in my Oscar post.

Well, to be more accurate, the spelling issues.

I mean I have grammar issues in every post.

But I should at least get the spelling right.

Im blaming the mistakes on James Franco.

This week has been INSANE!

I'm not kidding.

Have I mentioned I have some kitchen issues happening?

Basically a pipe in my kitchen has rotted out, I didn't know it, and now I have water damage to the floors and lord knows where else in the kitchen.

So I have been on the phone during my lunch breaks calling insurance companies, plumbers, inspectors and lawyers. It's exhausting.

On top of that I have had a really busy work load this week along with dealing with other crazies/craziness.

I have had a meeting each night after work which has caused me to miss my normal scheduled workouts.

Whenever I get out of my weekly routine I just feel off.

ya know?

I will be playing catch up till the weekend gets here.

But ya know what,

It isn't all that bad. I mean it is exhausting but not bad. I like being busy.

And tonight... Is my hair appointment!

I think I have nixed the ombre idea. My stylist thinks it's a bit too trendy, although I still really dig it.

But he did say he could do something called balayage:

Essentially, balayage involves painting sections of the hair freehand, rather than using foils or a streaking cap. The end result is a sexy “grown out” look that takes literally minutes to achieve, and requires less maintenance than traditional highlights.

After I looked it up and saw pictures I decided this would be a better fit for me. I am really excited for low maintenance and a more natural look. Plus a desperately needed hair cut!

A few celebrities with the Balayage look:

Wish me luck!

Yes I am going to write a post on the Oscar'

2011-02-28T07:47:00.000-08:00

How much of a snooze fest were the Oscar's.

I only hung in for Franco's Space Cadet stares into the camera.

I have this weird love for James Franco.

I think he is talented.

And I kinda like that he could probably be considered wasted most of the time.

But in a subtle way.

and he is just so cute.

Not much of an Oscar host but cute.

Everything I wanted to win did.

Duh The Kings Speech.

Duh Natalie Portman. Although, that Jennifer Lawrence chick did a pretty good job in that lame movie about the meth addicts.

And the dresses,

here are my favorites:

Scar Jo was my favorite.

Loved the hair the makeup and the dress.

I just didnt love the way the dress looked on the red carpet.

But off the red carpet it was amazing.

I LOVED Mila's dress. Girl can wear a torn plastic sack and she would look so stunning.

She is beautiful.

How damn hot is Gwyneth Paltrow.

And no one, and I mean no one, can rock a middle part like her!

She is beautiful.

I know Im in the minority here,

but I really like Cate Blanchett's dess.

I just thoght it was so unique and flattering.

I mean I could go on.

Other faves included, Jennifer Lawrence, Amy Adams and Halle Barry.

And I cant really go into my worst dressed.

I missed most of the red carpet due to going the wrong way on the interstate on my way home this weekend.

And honestly I was mostly into the show for James Franco.

But there you have it.

Happy Monday,

Happy Weekend

2011-02-25T06:15:00.000-08:00

We Made It!

Some Thankfulness To Throw At Ya:

- Vegan cookies

- Clean Sheets

- Plumbers

- Warm Temps

- Friends

- Vacuums designed to clean out cars

- PBS Masterpiece Classic

- Pony Tail Holders

I leave you with this.

It's my jam of the week.

I am anticipating their full length album release

Have a Lovely Weekend!

Ive got the Blues today

2011-02-24T09:05:00.000-08:00

Sometimes a blue mood will just hit me.

Like today.

But in lew of my blue mood.

I am thinking about some red pants.

I really want some cropped red pants for the spring and summer.

Red is a hot color I hear.

And I dont have it in my closet.

Im thinking these from Lands End Canvas.

I like the price point for a red pant that Im not sure how much I will wear.

but I really like these too

I would wear them with a top like this:

and my new shoes!

If your having a bought of the blues today,

I suggest adding some red in.

Tell me the secret...

2011-02-23T06:15:00.000-08:00

About

how you learned to cook?

I don't know the first thing about cooking.

Seriously.

It is totally daunting and overwhelming to me.

The utensils

The ingredients

The spices

Everything, all of it.

Totally.Overwhelming.

But I am ready to tackle this fear.

So give me some tips.

How did you start cooking when you didn't know how?

What do I need to get started?

Any essentials?

Am I the only person who finds cooking scary?

Help?

A few Vegan questions to Clear Up:

2011-02-22T15:01:00.000-08:00

Some of you have commented and asked some questions about the Vegan thing going on here.

I will attempted to answer.

1. Why no Dairy?
It's not that I don't believe in dairy. Although, if you read this you might rethink the amount you are consuming. I am choosing to stay away from mass produced dairy. Usually the chicken and milk farms that mass produce what shows up in the dairy section of our grocery stores resort to just as inhumane treatment to animals as slaughter houses. Think puss filled utters being milked by steel claws over and over again and deplorable living conditions for these animals on top of awful abuse. (there are numerous reports on this inhumane treatment, here is just one. Soap box rant for a second: I honestly do not know how you could not be moved. I understand that these are 'just animals' to some people. But to inflict unnecessary brutality on any living creature moves me. Whether you agree with me or not, at least know that this is happening within these factories. Don't be ignorant and choose to not watch because you don't want to be moved to change.)

I believe in fresh farm milking and dairy production. If an animal is living a healthy happy lifestyle then by all means: reap the benefits of their utters and eggs! If I find a local farm that works under these conditions, then yes, give me the cheese, the milk and the eggs!
Until then I will abstain.

2. How do I get protein.
Well I am still working on this. But again, after reading this book and the incredible evidence noted to back it up, I believe as a society our thoughts on the amount of protein we need is a bit skewed.
It is still possible to get all the essential protein the body needs through a plant based diet. And from what I have read and believe, could be a much healthier source of protein than deriving it from animal based foods. Again, as one trying to learn to cook, I am still working on the protein thing. But I do know that a healthy amount of fruits, veggies, beans and raw nuts are a good start.

Keep the questions coming. I am happy to answer.

Caroline

14 day vegan challenge

2011-02-22T08:11:00.000-08:00

I was so good my first week writing down each and every little vegan thing I had.

But if you haven't figured this out about me yet,

I'm not one for hardcore schedules or regimented postings,

so the detail descriptors were lacking in week two.

But I will say. I stuck to this experiment to the best of my ability.

minus two occasions,

both involving a chicken dinner and the most amazing cake balls to ever grace this planet.

and both involving me in a situation where it would have been rude to say: Oh I cant eat your lovely home cookd meal because, although I am not a full fledged- real vegan, I am sort of experimenting with it, so could you cook up some tofu?

But other than that.

I remained vegan.

And it wasnt so bad.

Really not bad at all.

And I like the way I am eating now.
I haven't eaten fast food in two weeks.
Not that I was a huge consumer of fast food.
But there was always the option of Chick-fil-A or some other 'acceptable' (in my mind) quick trip through a drive through.
And the amount of processed foods that used to fill my pantries, fridge and freezer has dropped dramatically.
Now that I am trying to make this a lifestyle change rather than a 'diet' for a quick fix,
I am so much more prepared.

I don't need to go through the drive through because I make sure to stock up on healthful organic foods before my week starts.

But I also haven't gone completely in the other direction either and eaten only weird complicated vegan food.
I had a couple of happy hour nights out during the two week experiment where liquor was served up with a side of chips, guacamole and salsa.
Add to that the most amazing black bean burger and garden burgers you have ever had both with a side of sweet potato fries.
Not exactly sprouts.
And then Friday I threw some Boca Vegan Chicken Nuggets in the oven as I sat down with Dateline.

Ive decided to stick with this vegan-ish thing.
Im not gonna lie.
Fake cheese sucks.
And sometimes you just need a good ole piece of cake when someone presents you with one.
So I may have a bit of dairy here and there.
And maybe a bit of meat if I am in a home where a meal is being cooked up for me.
But day to day. I will try to avoid dairy and will abstain from meat.

I still have a lot to learn about this lifestyle:
How to get enough nutrients and vitamins or how to cook in general... (still haven't mastered this one at all.)

So I am sticking with it.
We'll see how it goes.
It's a learning thing.
Gonna do the best I can.

I'm Making A Change

2011-02-21T06:05:00.000-08:00

To My hair.
It's time.
I really have never done anything different with my hair.
The main reason: I have this weird thing with thinking my face is fat.
And so I get really scared to change my hair up.
But I am so tired of it.
I am still growing it out ( I am not a fan of short hair. Been there, done it, tried to like it, just don't.)
But despite still being in the growing out process,
I need a little something.
For as long as I can remember I have had some version of:
Blonde hair with a swoop.
No bangs,
No color change,
rarely any layers.
Just short or long with a swoop and blonde.

See what I mean. Always the same.

So after seeing my friend Megan's new Ombre hair.

I decided to take the plunge, call the stylist, and make a date with my hair.

I think I can rock some Ombre.

low maintenance. A little carefree hippie-ish look.

I dig it.

And for a cut?

Im thinking more Layers.

A La Claire, January and Michelle.

(love Michelle's Bangs!)

Gettin Crazy Over Here!

The date is set for March 2nd.

Dont let me back out.

Friday Thankfulnes

2011-02-18T07:55:00.000-08:00

- SATC reruns. They never get old and I love seeing all of Carrie's old outfits again and again.

- Nice weather. Oh boy, am I thankful for this one.

- Hand written notes

- Home cooked meals

- iPods
- Clean Sheets
- Nail Polish
- Brothers
- Straightening iron converted into an iron for semi wrinkle free clothing
- Ceiling Fans
- Weekends away with friends

I hope you all have a lovely weekend!

Enjoy the weather if it is nice and fair in your part of the globe!

Tibi

2011-02-17T12:53:00.000-08:00

I love Tibi's Spring Line.
I want it all.
But If I cant have it all.
here are my picks.

2011-02-16T14:40:00.000-08:00

Im still trying to remain Vegan by the way:

Monday:
Bfast: Kombucha Green Tea
Plum
Lunch: Vegan Boca Burger. humus and wheat thins.
Dinner: Non Vegan. Had a valentine dinner and the best freakin cake ball EVER! The dairy was worth it.

Tuesday:
Bfast: Republic of Tea Spiced Green Tea
Strawberries

Lunch: Peanut Butter and Jelly, Carrots and Humus, vegan chocolate chip cookie.
Dinner: Black bean burger in a salad with white balsamic vinaigrette, half a grapefruit.

Not gonna lie, today I ate about 5 Samoa Girl Scout Cookies :/

Im Learning A Lot

2011-02-16T08:16:00.000-08:00

About God's Faithfulness.

I used to worry worry worry.

Worry to the point that I was on medication and in therapy.

And I used to live in the past.

Thinking: What if this, or Was that the best decision and mourning over loves lost and roads not taken.

Thus, again, landing me in therapy and on medication.

Therapy helped.

And the medication helped me cope when I couldn't.

and at some point in the past two and a half years post graduation I have weened myself off of meds and graduated from therapy.

I entered into a new peaceful state with my worry.

The worry wasn't gone. But I had learned to deal with it and to cope.

Yet despite all the resources I used to help me cope and deal with my 'worry'

I always wrestled with the fact that God tells us not to worry.

For Anything!

Not your past, not your future, not the right now, Nothing.

(Matthew 6:25-43)

This is a hard lesson.

Maybe the hardest for me.

I started thinking about God's Plan vs. God's Faithfulness.

When written out in words, what's the difference?

And maybe theologically there isn't

But to me and my worrying mind and wrestling brain

There is.

I have always known: God has a plan for my life.

(Jeremiah 29:11)

I grew up learning that.

And I am grateful for that principle that was embedded into my heart and mind at a young age.

But knowing He had a plan,

never had me trusting in Him fully.

I still worried that I would screw up the plan or that I had already screwed it up by not doing this or that.

And so He was re-working 'the plan' around my many faults.

Then I read about Joseph.

I mean I have heard the story a million times in my 25 years.

But to be completely honest, I probably had not read through the story with my own two eyes since grade school.

But I read it

and I learned that,

Not only does God have a plan.

He is Faithful.

I wont recount the whole Joseph saga.

you can read it here.

But I find it magnificent that God, not only had a plan, but was so faithful to Joseph.

He granted him favor in the midst of awful circumstances and in the end even healed and reconnected a family that had been torn apart by tragedy.

Not only was God faithful to Joseph in the circumstances of his life but also in the cultivation of his heart.

I am stunned at Josephs instant forgiveness to his family.

That can only come by the grace of a God who is faithful, good and who held Josephs life and heart in the palm of His hand.

You still may be wondering why I see a difference in a plan vs. faithfulness.

Here is how I see it:

A plan is good. But A plan does not produce hope.

You can believe in a plan.

But if you don't have Faith in that plan, well then, get ready for a long road of questioning and worry.

( Proverbs 13:12).

You must have faith, in order to trust, and through both faith and trust; hope is produced.

And hope is amazing grace for people like me, who tend to worry worry worry, instead of having faith, trusting, and leaning on Hope.

(Hebrews 11:1)

Peace,

Caroline

Confession

2011-02-15T09:01:00.000-08:00

Confession,

I almost cried today when I saw a picture of the beach on Hautelook's getaway page.

I am that desperate for warm weather and sunshine.

I am a summer person through and through.

I never want fall to come because I know it will turn into winter, which I hate.

Give the humidity and the beaming sun and I'm in heaven.

Seriously.

Summer I miss you.

In preparation for the upcoming season.

And to hopefully wish it my way a little sooner than expected.

I picked these up as a Vday gift to myself.

They are Extremely similar to a pair of Louboutin's that I have been coveting for about a year.

Just at a better price.

Also, I wanted to give a shout out to Penny Lane Designs for my Blog facelift. Thank you! And I love it!

Peace,

Caroline

Happy Valentines Day

2011-02-14T09:52:00.000-08:00

Happy Lovers Day.

I don't have a significant other to spend it with this year.

But I'm ok with that.

I hope that if you do, you have a lovely day with that special someone.

And if you don't, there's always next year right?

Just kidding. If your single like me, just enjoy the day and be thankful for the love that you do have in your life.

I leave you with this little love song.

By four of my most favorite musicians.

(who aren't too tough to look at either.)

"She keeps it Simple

And I am thankful for her kind of loving,

Because it's simple."

Week 1 Vegan review

2011-02-14T07:46:00.000-08:00

Well It hasn't been bad.

Nor that long in this journey.

But I will say last Sunday as I perused Whole Foods trying to gather all the necessities the Skinny Bitch said I needed for my pantry, I almost had a break down. I turned to my roommate and said 'Can I just leave this cart in a random aisle and leave?'

It all seemed really daunting to me.

Half the stuff in my cart I had never heard of.

I guess I thought that in order to go vegan I would have to do all of these crazy cooking things right off the bat.

And that isn't true.

Yes I need to learn to cook in order to be a well balanced vegan.

But this week has been full of baby steps towards this lifestyle. You can see it in what I ate. I never really cooked a full vegan meal. I sort of stuck to easy things.

Yet despite that, I remained vegan.

Which gave me confidence.

You can go slow with this yet still do it whole heartedly.

I think the fact that I did my research was KEY in making this week a success.

I was worried I would cheat.

But I didn't.

When thinking over why I didn't cheat,

I came to the realization that this isn't a diet for me.

It's not a fad that I want to stick with because of some lack of self esteem issue when it comes to being in a bathing suite. (which is what I would do in the past.)

I am doing it for moral reasons.

and for my health.

And that is worth sticking with.

and that makes it way easier to stick with too.

The food.

Well I would say I definitely need to add in more veggies.

I noticed a lack of them when looking back on my daily reviews.

I need to work on making meals.
And thinking ahead in preparing meals.
Sunday I was just out of food and needed to go grocery shopping so nothing I put in my mouth was particularly healthy or filling.

But I did swing by Whole Foods late Sunday night and grabbed an assortment of fruits, veggies and meat replacer for dishes to have for lunch and dinner. I feel more prepared meal wise for the week ahead.

I will say, I miss cheese. And I miss turkey. Turkey and cheese were my go to items for salads and sandwiches (which I live off of).
But I didn't cheat!

Tonight I will be breaking my vegan experiment.
I am headed to a Vday dinner where a meal will be cooked for me.
And I feel like it would be rude, in this circumstance, to preface the dinner with, "Im sorta trying to be vegan." Or upon arrival state I cant eat anything on my plate.
But I will try to do the best I can.
Sometimes that is the best you can do.

Cheers to week one and to the beginning of week two!

Sunday Vegan Fare:

BFast: Fruit & Nut Kind bar

Lunch: hmmmm... Grazing. Hummus with Wheat Thins and some Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookies

Dinner: Whole Whate Pasta with Carrots, Sugar Snap Peas, and a soy dressing plus wheat bread with olive oil and pepper.

Snacked all day on Chocolate Chip cookies and Mint non dairy ice cream. Oh so healthy.

Peace,

Day 5 and 6 Vegan Review

2011-02-12T20:13:00.000-08:00

Friday:
Bfast: Kombucha Green Tea
Organic Granny Smith Apple
Lunch: Oh so healthy: Vegan cupcake
Dinner: Boca Burger with Humus and Wheat Thins

Saturday:
Bfast: Kombucha Green Tea
Half an Organic Banana
Lunch: Veggie Quesadilla
Dinner: So healthy, again, sweet potato fries vegan chocolate chip cookie

I was CRAVING some cheese like whoa today! But I didnt eat any!

Peace,

Happy Weekend

2011-02-11T08:38:00.000-08:00

This week has gone bye way faster than last week.

Thank God.

I decided last night.

When thinking about blogging that I should be more intentional about my posts.

I feel like most of the stuff I write about is totally random.

Which is ok.

But sometimes, when I read blogs, I really enjoy a weekly series of posts. Something to look forward to ya know?

So how about

Thankful Fridays.

That's an intentional post right?

So from now on, every Friday is thankful Friday.

and the rest of the four day week will remain random postings from inside my brain until I further notify you.

Thankfulness of the week:

- Dry Shampoo. You save my life each and every week when I can not drag myself out of bed to wash my hair.

- Yogi Kombucha Green Tea. For someone who doesn't drink coffee, it's nice to have this every morning.

- Bible Study. First time in my small group search, I have found one that actually fits. Thankful Thankful Thankful!

- The Civil Wars. Just good, beautiful, simple music.

- Seth Avett's face popping up in my email inbox yesterday morning. Made my morning A-ok!

- Avett's concert in Tuscalooosa in April. Something to look forward too...

- Nice weather this weekend. (James Spann you better not be lying!)

- Food Processor. Who knew?

- Happy Hours. Not just one, but two this week!

- Black Bean Burgers and Hummus. Mmmmmhhhhmmmmm

- STEP SING - my Alma Mater does this thing where all the greeks and some independents put on a show of stepping and singing. It's a big damn deal to us. To others, not so much. Probably the cheesiest thing in the world but I'm ok with that. ( GO CHI OMEGA! XO!)

For your enjoyment here's a taste of Step Sing.

And if you're following my vegan journey:
Day 4 Review:
Bfast: Yogi Kombucha Green Tea, banana
Snack: Fruit & Nut Kind Bar
Lunch: Wasn't that hungry snacked on some Organic Red Pepper Humus and carrots.
Dinner: Black bean burger, lettuce, tomato, ketchup with Sweet potato fries.

Still trugging along on this vegan train! Not so bad. Not so bad!

Peace,

Let's Talk Chocolate

2011-02-10T08:33:00.000-08:00

I am a lover of cheese and chocolate.
Two things of which I had to give up in there mass produced form.
And instead buy vegan substitutions.

When I first started on this venture, Oh a mere 3 days ago, the first order of business was finding a chocolate cupcake recipe that could give me the fix of chocolate that I crave, basically, every minute of the day.
Y'all saw my first attempt.
I took this recipe from the Skinny Bitch cookbook.
and I mean, more than likely I was the one who goofed it up, not the Skinny Bitch who wrote the recipe and got it published.
So I will try it again.

The second recipe I used came from allrecipes.com
It seemed super easy.
Way easier than the one I had attempted before.
And of course I had to taste the batter before baking.

And it was scrumptious!

And then I baked the batter
and it turned into this:

Success.
until.
I let them cool and they hardened and the cupcake liners got stuck to the cake.
Fail.

But the icing was a vegan win!
(EathFare (fake butter), confectioners suger, vanilla extract, almond milk, mixed together in my food processor.)

SO,
Im gonna try again.
In order to remain a vegan I have to have a perfected cupcake under my belt.
Here is my question though, to you bakers,
In the Allrecipes.com cupcake recipe the ingredients call for one cup of water. Can I substitute almond milk for the water? Or if Im getting really crazy and wanting to add some flavor, can I substitue a half a cup orange juice and a half cup of almond milk for the water?
I feel like the milk would make the cake batter a bit moister when it bakes. And the orange juice would add some flavor.
Bakers, thoughts?

And if your following my vegan journey
Day 3 in review:
Bfast: Yogi Kombucha Green Tea
Cantaloupe and about 4 bites of overnight oats with Bear Naked Granola before I spilled it on the ground.
Lunch: My first lunch at a restaurant! Bottletree Vegan Chili, Red Pepper Humus with Pita Bread and a few sweet potato fries.
Dinner: Corn chips, salsa, guacamole, whole wheat pasta with broccoli and marinara. Two Vodka and Cranberries.

I sort of took it all out today. I wouldn't say I was particulary healthy today but I did stay vegan while going to two restaurants. I even bowed out of dessert and cake! Tonight I definitely feel bloated, but I mean look at what I ate! So I mean you can still eat 'fun' and stay vegan.
Tomorrow it's back to a healthier fare!

Peace,

I got nothin, other than a vegan day 2 recap

2011-02-09T08:26:00.000-08:00

Hopefully I will be back tomorrow with a more inspiring post

But if your following my Vegan journey:

Day 2 Review:
Bfast: Yogi Organic Kombucha Green Tea
Mandarin Oranges
Snack: Half of a Fruit & Nuts Kind Bar
Lunch: Vegan Boca Burger on a multi grain sandwich round with a tiny bit of ketchup, avocado, lettuce and melted Daiya (fake) cheese. Organic Red Pepper Humus with Wheat Thins.
Snack: Almonds and Cantaloupe.
Dinner: Well I didn't really have dinner. I attempted another try at Vegan cupcakes. Which at first right, out of the oven, were ok. But then they hardened and the cupcake liners got stuck to the cake. Fail. But the icing was ok. So dinner was a cupcake followed by some organic red pepper humus and wheat thins.

I REALLY enjoyed the Boca Burger. So so tasty.
Again, no bloating! ITS A MIRACLE!
I will say I was sort of hungry mid afternoon into the night. I just wanted to snack. I think I would have been better off having a salad for lunch and saving the Boca burger for dinner. I ended up snacking on hummus into the night and for dinner and then had the cupcake. Not a very well rounded dinner meal.

Peace,

Kitchen Disaster (vegan review day 1)

2011-02-08T07:16:00.000-08:00

Last night I went to a small group.

I was nervous.

I've had some weird experiences with small groups. You just never know what you're going to get.

But

I love this one!

Hallelujah!

In some way all of the women in the group are connected somehow.

The craziest connection?

One lady goes to visit my brother and sister-n-law regularly in Honduras!

How CRAZY is that?

Im really really excited about this small group and what is in store for me and all of us!

In other Vegan news.

I tried my first attempt at baking Vegan cupcakes.

I had all the supplies and recipe at hand.

But somehow all this

Turned into this:

Not exactly a pourable mix to bake.

Im not really sure what happened.

I think the fact that I dont own a mixer could have been an issue.

I guess I will try again after I pick a mixer up sometime soon.

And if you are following my vegan journery,

I will be regularly posting on different topics

but you can find of day review of my vegan meals at the bottom of each post.

And if you are following my 2wk Vegan journey:
Day 1 Review:
Bfast: Yogi Kombucha Green Tea (so so yummy.)
Banana
Lunch: Table Spoon Organic Red Pepper Humus w/ Triscuits.
Salad w Avacado, Organic Granny Smith Apple, Daiya shredded (fake) cheese, Walnuts, Marie's Raspberry Vinaigrette. Whole Foods Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookie (yum yum yum)
Snack: 1/2 Whole Foods Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookie
Dinner: Bowl of Panera's Garden Vegetable soup with Pesto. And Dang it. I just looked up the ingredients and it looks like there was some swiss in this soup. I didnt even taste it so it wasnt significant. But I had to catch dinner on the fly because I had Bible study. No time to get home. Probably not all that Vegan but at least I went into Panera choosing what I thought was the best Vegan option.
Snack: Half of a Whole Foods Almond Vegan Cookie.

All in all for my first day, I think I did ok. I can honestly say I was NEVER starving. Ever. and I didnt have a craving for anything non vegan, even when the opportunity for non vegan food presented itself. I need to cut back on the cookies.
It may sound crazy since I have only been doing this one day but I honestly feel more awake and less bloated. Over all today wasnt bad. Actually enjoyable.

Peace,

I have made a decision

2011-02-07T12:54:00.000-08:00

To go Vegan for at least two weeks.

And maybe, just maybe, adopt it as a lifestyle change.

After reading this, this and this.

I just can't ignore that our food industry is MAJORLY dysfunctional and that our food and diets are currently causing a huge strain on our bodies and our already broken health care system.

On top of those two factors, I cried when reading excerpts from slaughter house employees. Yes you meat lovers can argue that there are laws enforcing humane slaughtering of animals. (if you call stunning humane) But after reading stories from these employees, I am convinced that these laws are OFTEN broken and that no government agency is keeping a very watchful eye on slaughter houses.

On top of that, there are no laws regarding the humane slaughter of Chickens and Turkey's so forget even allowing them a shred of humanity before they end up on our plates.

Add to this, abominable animal transportation laws (or lack there of) and you are looking at a very cruel, unregulated, safety risk situation here.

As the Skinny Bitches say: You are what you eat. And if you choose to eat meat prepared in this way, well you are eating a lot of stress, pain and suffering.

Right after I read all of this and made this decision this tweet showed up in my feed:

@cnnbrk: USDA: 3,000 pounds of ground beef recalled over possible E. coli contamination http://www.cnn.com/2011/HEALTH/02/05/california.beef.recall/index.html

I took it as a sign that this experiment was a good idea.

I know this is somewhat controversial to some people. And I know that people are probably gonna give me the crazy stare when I tell them I am eating vegan.

But it is a personal choice that I am making after doing a lot of research on the subject.

It is an educated experiment if you will.

Call me a hippie.

whatever.

But I am making my carbon foot print smaller and, if I stick with it, will be saving at least 99 animals a year from being slaughtered, all while improving my health and moral well being.

And that's a good thing in my eyes.

I am just at the beginning of what I am right now calling an 'experiment'.

There are probably gonna be some failures.

But I am committed to at least stick with it for two weeks and then make an assessment on a lifestyle change from there.

What I do know for sure is that if I don't remain vegan, meat will be a very very small part of my life moving forward.

So Cheers to my experiment.

And I will definitely keep you up to date on how it is going seeing as how I don't know the first thing about cooking (but really I know nothing...) and these vegan foods (tofu, sheese (fake cheese), nonayaise (fake mayonaise)) are gonna get me a bit out of my comfort zone.

Just FYI: I know that there are some farms where animals raised for slaughter and dairy production live a happy healthy free to roam lifestyle before that one bad day comes. But these nice places are found few and far between in our country. So the above is concerning the overall meat producing companies and slaughterhouses and their affect on our health, government and animal rights.

Peace,

Weekend Review

2011-02-07T07:30:00.000-08:00

How was your weekend?

Well mine was great. In a very low key way.

Nothing too exciting but I just had some excellent chill time this weekend.

Friday I went to a local music venue to hear The Civil Wars play.

It was great. They are great. You should take a listen.

The only thing that kinda bugged me was,

that a friend and I asked to borrow some chairs that weren't being used by two girls at a table.

And when we asked they just told us to sit with them at the table.

That was nice.

It was a good view and nice to have a chair.

But the girls we shared a table with were a little rowdy.

Annoying to the point I was sort of embarrassed for myself.

They liked to shout and I think at one point security told them to shut it.

Yea. Embarrassing.

But still. The music was good. And you should check out my friend Craig's pics from the night.

And I swear, the smile on Joy Williams face never fell. Her cheeks must hurt.

Saturday I got up super early to hit the gym.
then I headed to the book store to do a little studying on a new interest of mine. Which I will share more about at some point.
Saturday night was really low key for me.
I ended up reading most of the night and then watching Catfish.
Any of you all seen it?
Well it definitely confirmed my suspicions: People are crazy.
But what really struck me was the way the main guy, Nev, reacted to the situation that unfolded ( I wont give it away). I would have FREAKED out. But he handled it with such grace.
It was very interesting.

Sunday,
Well you know.
The super Bowl.

How was your weekend?
Happy Monday.

Peace,

Just a few things I may be saving for:

2011-02-03T07:05:00.000-08:00

Tory Burch Short Shelbee Dress

Tory Burch Robinson Satchel in this lovely green color

Marc Jacobs Anne Cotton Dress.

Calypso St. Barth Ikat Caftan Dress.... SWOON!

Calypso St. Barth Bone Bangle.

DVF Tabalah Dress

DVF Arely Bis Dress

DVF Helena Wrap Dress

I've got a thing going with the DVf. Honestly I love all her dresses right now.

Check em out.

Peace,

Happy Hump Day Links

2011-02-02T12:03:00.000-08:00

Hello!

I'm super busy today.

but I wanted to stop in to share some link love.
I talked with an office friend. Who reads HTML and he showed me how to make a link open a new window instead of taking you away from the blog post.
I feel so smart!

Let's begin

First of all.

I did a two hour workout last night.

Unheard of.

But hopefully it will pay off...

anyways, I was in my spin class and my teacher plays the weirdest music.

a mix of Movie scores, techno music, and video game music like Mario Brothers.

I dont get it.

Any of you do spin? How's the instructor's music selection?

Speaking of music.

Allow me to go off on a tangent here for a minute,

I bought my tickets for this, this morning. It's gonna be a blast. If you live anywhere in the general vicinity, you should come on down!

Also.

I'm gonna let you in on a little secret that saves my life and $ when it comes to buying music.

Amazon MP3's.

SO Cheap!

They have a huge selection for $5.00.

And yesterday I bought the new Civil Wars album for $6.99! beats iTunes pricing any day.

the mp3's are transferred straight into your iTunes library once they are downloaded.

EASY PEASY!

and lastly.

The White Stripes have officially broken up.

I can't talk about it at this moment.

I guess I will still get my fix of Jack. But what about Meg?...

Onto other non music news:

Anybody watch Oprah yesterday?

I have always had an interest in educating myself about where my food comes from.

I always say this: Education on anything is SO key in making a change or difference in your life, someone else's or the world. Get educated. It's a free gift that we have in this country and people are often to lazy to to do the work, therefore adding to the problems rather than stopping them or fixing them. (END RANT).

So back to Oprah.

She had Micheal Pollan on.

Always so interesting.

And again the show revived my interest in food education.

Have any of you gone vegan? Vegetarian? Or made any other big change in your diet due to educating yourself on our food industry?

Ok well I'm out.

Peace,

Bikram Round 2

2011-02-01T08:05:00.000-08:00

Well I returned to hot yoga for my second class.

I wont lie to you,

the thing that really got me there was the Living Social deal that popped into my inbox Sunday morning.

It featured $25 for 5 classes at my local hot yoga studio.

That's pretty much 5 classes rolled into the price of one.

So I scooped it up.

And tried to syke myself up for my second round with the yogis.

First of all.

You could pick me out of a line up in 2.5 seconds as the girl who has never 'really' done yoga in her life.

Not only am I the most inflexible person in the world.

I also own No yoga attire.

Except for REALLY crappy yoga pants from like Old Navy or something.

Yesterday I showed up in some running shorts that are slit up the sides and offer a form fitting dry wick short of sorts underneath along with a running dry fit tank.

I looked ridiculous.

I brought my own mat this time.

God knows why I even own it.

It was stuffed in the back of my car and it wasnt even rolled up. Just thrown back there folded haphazardly on top of its self. The corner on one end was basically folded back in a permanent position making it somewhat embarassing when I tried to roll it out once in the studio and it wouldnt lay flat.

Dead sign for: SHE DOESNT DO YOGA MUCH... or at all.

I wasnt the only beginner though this round.

Looks like a lot of other 'newbies' scooped up that living social deal too.

Although Im pretty sure Im the only one who showed up in hard core running clothes + flip flops.

Rock on.

Well the class started.

And I swear,

If it is even possible,

I sweated more this go around than I did the first time.

I was sliding all over my matt.

And maybe the purpose of a yoga pant in a 104 degree room is so that your foot, when lifted into tree pose, can grip the cotton or whatever fabric your pant is made of and stay in place on your thigh.

Tree pose is a problem when you are bending your sweaty foot and trying to make it stay in place on your sweaty thigh.

Slippage happens.

I got dizzy this round too.

I honestly think it had something to do with what I ate for lunch (leftover pizza). For some reason I think sweating all that out and having a heavy lunch in my stomach caused me to get tired and dizzy this time.

I could be wrong.

I mean It actually was probably because Im out of shape, in a room heated to the degree of hell, trying to bend my body into positions that just dont really work out so well. All while slipping in my own sweat in my running clothes.

yea forget the pizza.

A towel is key for hot yoga.

Like, seriously, dont forget your towel.

Because me and my friend did.

So we had the bright idea to 'borrow' the towels we saw stacked in the back closet on the way to the bathroom. We would descreetly throw them in the hamper after class.

But

Yogis have like three eyes or something.

and a sick yogi sixth sense.

After class our instructor was quick to point out the the towels we borrowed were for 'clean up and showering.' and that 'white towels were available up front.'

As my friend put it, "He was quite aggressive about those towels."

So just dont forget a towel.

You might mess up the third eye, sixth sense, one with the universe vibe going down in the studio.

But I finished.

And I mean those last 20 minutes, Im not gonna lie, really are hell.

But Im gonna go back for round 3 because I have 4 more free classes left.

And maybe, like the yogi said, It'll "get me.'

Peace,

20 something poll response

2011-01-31T07:56:00.000-08:00

I loved all the responses to the 20 something poll!
Thank you for your comments!

It seems everyone was a bit shocked by life after college.

Some are still adjusting to the shock of it all.
And some have settled into what their life is now and wouldn't change it if they could.

I was happy to see that no one felt completely derailed or lost. Maybe a hint of both of those mixed with the hope that things will, in the end, work out the way they should.

Post College/20's life for me is Weird. And still something I am trying to navigate my way through.

It is a weird time that no one prepares you for.

You have all these dreams when you are leaving college of what awaits you 'out there'.

And then the shock of it all hits you like a ton of bricks.

Or at least it did me.

I seriously had the HARDEST time my first year out of college.

I just couldn't cope.

(enter therapy and meds.)

I felt alone.

All of my friends were just gone.

They had moved away or taken jobs that didnt leave us time to spend together like we had back in the dorm room days.
And the one's that were still around, were pursuing a different path than I was that was taking us farther apart rather than bringing us together like college had.

There was no one planning mixers or intramural games for after my 9 to 5 day in my cubbie.
It is just a weird weird time of quiet post 4 years of disco-ing through life.
It was REALLY hard for me.

I felt totally overwhelmed when I started my Monday through Friday job.
You are used to a life of spontaneity and a lack of hard scheduling when you're in college.

NO ONE PREPARES YOU FOR THE 9-5!

Yes I am SO thankful for my job.

But 9-5 can be a killer.

It can kill your psyche and your spirit.

You sit in front of a computer all day in a cubbie.

That isnt exactly the 'dream' I had planned for myself post college.

I felt really alone.
College is scary when you first arrive.
But at least you are navigating the waters with people in the exact same boat as you in an environment catered to make you feel at home.
The working world/post college world just isn't that way.
It's dog eat dog out there.
Screw Greek letters meant to make you feel part of a sisterhood.
yea, you may wear the uniform of a professional,
but in no way are there big sisters out there to welcome you with a box of goodies and songs and clapping when you arrive to your stark cubbie on your first day in the 'real world'. You work for the man now honey, you dont party for the collective good of ideal minded university students anymore.
It's a shock to say the least.

I make it sounds so negative.
I dont mean to be that way.
But for real, No One ever told me that life after college is really hard.
So I just wanted to talk about it openly on here.

I know though that it is somewhat of a mindfield now.
But there is still good.
I have a good happy life,
I am so blessed.
And I know, from many wise wise women in my life, that life is what you make it.
And that it will get better.
And that right now,
the questions and weird up and down emotions are normal.
And I know,
from your comments,
that most of us are in the same post college 'What the heck is going on' boat.
That is comforting.

So band together with the 20 somethings around you.
Soon we'll be 30?....

Peace,

First 10 Songs when you shuffle your Pod... Go!

2011-01-28T07:30:00.000-08:00

1. Get On Top - Red Hot Chili Peppers

2. Howlin' For You - The Black Keys

3. Crash Into Me - DMB

4.Can't Keep It In - Cat Stevens

5. I still Care For You - Ray LaMontagne

6. War - Good Old War

7. Body Movin' - Beastie Boys

8. How Sweet It Is (To be loved by you) - Good ole James T.

9. Coconut (Live) - Widespread Panic

10. You're So Gangsta - Chromeo

What about you?

Peace,

Poll

2011-01-27T05:30:00.000-08:00

I have deep conversations with a friend over gchat most days.

And most days our deep convos turn to, WHAT THE HECK ARE WE DOING WITH OUR LIVES?!

I know that at 25, I am wrestling with a lot and questioning a lot.

This is probably normal.

I hope.

But we wondered.

So me and my questioning gchat friend thought we'd see

How many other 20 somethings are in the same place; questioning everything.

So we wanted to do a poll.

If you wouldn't mind indulging us.

If you are a 20 something,

Just comment a, b or c and if you want, expound on why you answered a,b or c.

A. Is this what you thought your 20's would be like?

B. Do you feel satisfied with the direction your life is going?

C. Do you feel totally derailed and lost?

Life, Through Rose Colored Glasses, Right?

Peace,